joy

To Know His Nature

bible, christian, spiritual formation

“Then the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, ‘It is the Lord!’ As soon as Simon Peter heard him say, ‘It is the Lord,’ he wrapped his outer garment around him (for he had taken it off) and jumped into the water.” – John 21:7

What a difference it makes in a broken person’s life to understand the nature of Jesus.

Mistakes happen. Some brush it off, some learn from them, and some – well, I fear too many of us – allow them to define them and their way of thinking. Our responses vary based on the severity of our wrong doings, but nevertheless, they often have a greater impact on us than we would like to admit.

In the end of the Gospel of John, we come across the denial from Peter. A man who walked with Christ in the flesh and learned from Him for roughly three years…fell short. When times got tense and his physical life was at stake, he let go of what mattered most for what he thought was more important at the time.

But can we blame him? As much as we want to say that we would have done it differently, is that really true? How often do we break our commitment to obeying God for immediate satisfaction in just the span of one week? We are no different than Peter. For all we have known since our first breath, was life on earth. So it is only natural for us to protect it above all else when it is at risk of being taken. Regardless of how much we believe in eternity, we have yet to experience it. So now, we see that we stand in very similar sandals of this broken, sinful disciple.

We’ve let people down. We’ve said rude things. We have chosen to satisfy ourselves over helping another. We have fallen short. Time and time again. But may we not forget the nature of the loving One we made our commitment to.

After the denial, Peter went back to what he did prior to meeting Jesus. He was fishing with his friends. After trying all night, the morning comes and a man from the shore directs them to cast their nets again. Surely doubtful, yet in obedience, they throw their nets and pull up an abundance. Without much time passing, John recognizes the man was Jesus. In saying it, Peter immediately jumps out of the boat and swims towards Christ.

When they met, Jesus had prepared breakfast for them and we then see one of the most loving moments ever. Jesus asks Peter if he loves Him. Not once. Not twice. But the same amount of times that he denied Him. After each time, He gave Peter a responsibility. This is an incredible moment, for we see that Jesus, though rejected by his own friend, leads us in how we ought to forgive. Not because He needed to, but because His love for us is so very strong.

In this moment, Peter had two options. He could either say, “I have betrayed you, there is no way I can grow the kingdom.”, and then return to fishing, that which he had known about well and found security in. Or he could pursue the next step in the establishment of the early church, trusting that the new identity and call from Jesus was possible despite his brokenness.

I want to note that it wasn’t a matter of the specific job, it was about the call. Would he let go of what he found purpose in prior to meeting Christ so that he can work towards expanding the kingdom, or will his failure and desire for security and familiarity consume him?

I have always struggled with my immediate thoughts. When I get hurt, I may have learned to hold in my outward expressions, but it is always a battle in my mind. Whether it is bitterness, rude thoughts, a grudge, or the internal planning of my next petty move, I could not seem to change inwardly.

The other day, it occurred to me the type of person I was becoming. A hypocrite. My thoughts were allowed to run wild as long as my outward emotions remained contained because “taking captive every thought” was just too exhausting.

I held onto my brokenness as though it were a part of who I was created to be. But when I recognized that it was the complete opposite of how Christ loved others, I broke down. I could not even finish praying, for I felt so very ashamed. I felt disgusting before the Lord.

I went to sleep that night and awoke with the same empty, shaky feeling in my chest. The same one I felt after every big failure in my life. This was it. This was how I figured I would remain, for how could one altar their immediate thoughts? And if I couldn’t figure it out, how could I ever believe a loving God would want such a bitter person to have a part in His good plans?

Then, my scripture reading for that morning was the story I had just explained. The last chapter of John.

I imagine Peter felt guilt. And maybe he even lost hope in his potential of growing God’s kingdom. But what brought him to a place where he could be made new, was his faith in the nature of Christ. His faith in the One who met him where he was and promised to never leave him.

Peter went after Christ because he understood that Jesus was forgiving. He knew He was the One who makes old become new and the broken, redeemed. But he wouldn’t experience that if he hid in the boat because of his shame.

I sat there after reading that in complete awe. How many times have I avoided time with the Lord because I was ashamed of my actions? I cannot even count how many times I let my fear and my disappointment in myself steal moments I could rest in the forgiving presence of Christ.

The God we serve is the God of new things. I never thought about that deeply until last year when I was at a loss of where my life was going and God spoke, “from death to life” to me. It meant so much. But the expectancy I had for God to do that again has died down. To be transparent, I forgot about it. And in my lack of remembering, I let the lies of the enemy take root.

My disappointment, shame, hopelessness, and guilt drove my life. And for so long, I saw my mistakes as the reason I could not be who God calls us to become. But praise Him, for I was so wrong.

My dear friend, our brokenness is the very thing that God wants us to lay before Him so that He can make us new. Until we believe that He is greater than our mistakes, we will not understand the nature of who He is. For what significance does His forgiveness have if we were not in desperate need of it? His gentle, forgiving response to our failures is the path we must go through to become who He calls us to be. For our brokenness is the seemingly barren ground that He actually longs to make fruitful.

Henri J. M. Nouwen states, “If you are ready to listen from your brokenness then something new can come forth in you.“

Thoughts to Consider:

Is there any area of your life that you are not allowing God to change because you prefer the security it brings you?

Would you recognize God’s voice if it came in a way you didn’t expect? (This comes from time spent learning it.)

How can you take action towards letting God make new what you see as unredeemable?

Consider the life change you could experience and share if you not only knew but whole heartedly believed that God’s nature is one of boundless love.

“Then the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, ‘It is the Lord!’ As soon as Simon Peter heard him say, ‘It is the Lord,’ he wrapped his outer garment around him (for he had taken it off) and jumped into the water.” – John 21:7

March Musings – On Colossians and Gratitude

christian, spiritual formation

“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” – Colossians 4:2

We hear the concept of thankfulness a lot in the Church. Gratitude is no unfamiliar term for the Christian who has experienced nearly any worship service recently. But as I have been studying Colossians, I have some new insights on this practice.

As someone who finds it easier to see the glass half empty, thanksgiving isn’t the first thought that pops in my head during any given day. In fact, most days begin with frustration towards my alarm clock ringing at ungodly hours in the morning. Nonetheless, I have found it to be more important than I had originally thought.

I want to place these terms in your mind before going on: Grace. Thankfulness. Peace. Freedom.

In the beginning of Colossians, we see prayer tied together with thanksgiving. Paul begins his letter with the mention of the gratitude he expresses in his prayer life for the believers in Colossae. We then move on and see it again in reference to the way they ought to act towards the Father for the inheritance of the Holy Spirit (v. 12).

This is no accidental pattern. Paul was aware of something I myself often forget: God owes us nothing, yet He gave us everything. The way we act should flow from the response of God’s love in our hearts. So if we begin recognizing all God has done for us, it should be impossible for thanksgiving to NOT flow from our words, actions, and thoughts.

However, we are human. This is why, I believe, Paul mentioned the prayer he continued to pray over the believers in verses 9-11 saying, “We continuously ask God to fill you with the knowledge of His will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please Him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience.”

This prayer, I like to think, is partly because Paul was aware of our lack of understanding towards God’s grace. Grace is a beautiful thing. I wouldn’t have included in my blog’s name if I didn’t think it held any significance. However, I will admit, it isn’t the easiest term to move from our heads to our hearts.

What I mean by this, is that grace, or undeserved kindness, is often thrown around in conversation or on inspiration mugs and journals, yet misunderstood in bridge between our mind and heart. What we see in this very first chapter alone, is that humanity has a problem with follow through. The true Gospel has been shared and heard by countless, yet what reveals the difference between hearing it and believing it is the fruit we produce.

Fruit is often taught as the actions we are compelled to do based on the seeds we are cultivating inside of us. I wholeheartedly believe this to be true, but I would argue it includes something else as well. Something I haven’t felt great conviction for until recently.

This section of Colossians 1 brings up the Spirit and the way He redirects us to do things that glorify God. Yet I have found it also is referring to the way we understand salvation.

Morton Kelsey, in his book “Reaching”, discusses that humanity can tend to look at salvation as a path to eternity, yet dismiss the reality that it also brings freedom from what aims to kill us (spiritually). We look at this broken world, and see the hurting people around us and choose to do one of two things: accept it or claim it as discipline from God. Yet that would be completely unlike the God of the Bible, to inflict evil on humanity, for evil was the very thing He endured the cross for to rise over three days later. Our God, rather, “can use the afflictions of evil to work good, but a loving God does not send evil.” (Kelsey)

This is more relevant than I thought as I realized Colossians encourages a seeking attitude towards the Father, the Holy Spirit, and the freedom Christ gave us so that we may be able to truly live in grace.

It is no coincidence Paul begins and ends speaking grace over them. For if you cannot understand grace, God’s grace, you will continue striving for it all your life. Chasing it rather than God Himself.

So, we come to the point of verse 13.

It reads, “For He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son He loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”

The sacrifice of Christ was to reconcile us to Him for eternity, yes, but it was also to give us the opportunity to live for God without being bound by the chains of our sin. Grace was given, and that includes the way we are free to walk in. That being, peace.

In the latter part of Colossians we see our new call to be peace-makers. Acting in love and living a life where we allow Christ’s sacrifice to be enough for our sin. For until that truth moves from our heads to our hearts, we will but always walk with unnecessary burdens and allow God’s desires and direction for us be affected by the weight of chains God already broke.

For longer than I can remember, I have struggled with an anxious and downcast heart that I am often incapable to explaining. This has prevented a lot of growth towards God, not because of Him, but the lies I have caved into and gave the power to cripple me. Yet as I struggle still, I have found bits of Truth that have proved the complete victory Christ claimed over the powers that are seeking to kill me. This, I believe is part of the truth Paul is getting at here.

We so often become content with the suffering world that we neglect the freedom that comes with Christ in the here and now. Our God is a healing God. He is a loving God. He is a peaceful God. And until we recognize that truth and allow it to absorb into our heart and soul, we won’t understand the reason we ought to be thankful in all circumstances.

The verse I highlighted at the beginning of this blog was not discussed, but I wanted you to read it because I believe it is the way in which we come to a place, confident of the new life God offers through Jesus. Prayer is our direct line to the God who loves us beyond our comprehension. Though we must seek a place of total dependency on Him for our lives to take in and pour out true love, peace, and grace to others.

My dear friend, our joy does not have to begin when we reach eternity. The hope we believe in has a name. That hope, Jesus, is calling us to a new life right now. For all we find to be threatening to our spirit, He has already defeated. Nothing, my friend, can separate you from His love. So, I ask, when will you decide gratitude is more than just a good lyric in a song, and begin letting it be what your life sings out each and every moment of your days?

Thoughts to Consider:

Is thankfulness something you find easy to practice every day?

How can you practically discipline yourself to live in gratitude?

What are the situations in your life you find harder to be thankful during?

Consider if we followed the words of the great, Charlie Brown, “What if, today, we were grateful for everything?”

“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” – Colossians 4:2

Quit the Molding

Christian lifestyle, spiritual formation

For a while now, I have been working towards the development of a “morning routine” that first and foremost devoted time to God.

I am by no means a “morning person”, and frankly, I find it hard to believe many people naturally are. Nonetheless, studying the practices of others, I decided I would force myself to be one.

After spending 30-40 minutes with God nearly each morning, (yes, I have missed days here and there), I started to notice something…

It doesn’t get any easier. In fact, the reason I missed some days was due to the thought that I could wake up later, get ready for work first, and then do my quiet time. Yet, each and every time, I failed.

But alongside learning that, I also learned that the reason I have not quit and moved it all back to be a part of my nighttime routine, was because my heart hungered for it first thing in the morning.

When I would skip it, I would be angry and easily tempted into justify the sins that would result from that. But just a few hours later, I would find myself drowning in shame.

It was as though many soul developed a need for this time, this experience with God, before all else. So much so, that it would battle its old self and the new self all day long.

The old self would not mind if I had missed this time for weeks, as long as no one found out. Yet my new, redeemed, and Holy-Spirit filled soul knows there is better. Better when I devote my first fruits to God and invite Him into my every moment from the moment my eyes open to when they close at night.

I am aware this sounds silly or typical coming from a church worker, but I have found nothing calls me to this disciplined way besides the call of being a Christ follower. The fact that my family believes in Jesus does not compel me to spend more time in prayer. The fact that I work in ministry does not force me to read my Bible, for how would they know if I did not? And the “christian-writer” dream I have does not require me to devote my mornings to worshipping God.

No thing and no one has the power to dictate what I spend my free time doing. That is, and always will be, my responsibility. For my word can say one thing and my actions another.

The call I have decided to take on when I accepted Christ was one that would only be lived out through my personal devotion in spirit and acts to God.

So how and why then, do I say we ought to stop the molding?

I fear this society has acquired a mentality that what we want to do with our lives can be accomplished while simultaneously remaining inconvenienced.

We hear it all the time, some have even heard it from me in the past, “Find the time that best works for your schedule and section off 5-20 minutes to spend time with God.”

…I take back that advise if I have said it to you before.

What I have noticed is that our souls have a deep hunger and longing for the presence of God in every moment our lives and it’s going to take a lot more than 10 minutes of us reading a couple verses at night while we are half-asleep.

The Lord deserves more than that. And your soul, my friend, cannot survive like that forever.

We should not, and cannot, continue molding God around our lives.

We often hear the verse about giving our “first fruits” to God in relation to our money. That is what we call the tithe, our first 10% of our income.

But I would argue this should be applied in all we do. There is a lack of awareness of our soul’s needs that we cannot understand or even explain because it is so deep that we are sometimes left like babies, crying for a need, but incapable of expressing it in words.

This is not because we are dumb, but simply unaware. Our perspectives are limited, and unfortunately will remain that way without the leaning on the Holy Spirit. Proverbs 3:5-6 is quoted all over the place. We see it on a plaque at the church, printed on your grandma’s coffee mug, and surely you have seen it on a woman’s t-shirt before.

“Trust in the Lord with all you heart and lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways submit to Him and He will make your paths straight.”

Encouraging and sweet words that reveal the caring and wise heart of God, yet we still find ourselves only tuning into that source (God/Holy Spirit) for a few minutes at night.

I do not mean to be against the nighttime study crowd, but I am seeking to challenge you.

One of the biggest reasons people have told me, and even a reason that I used to say, was that the quietest time and the most free time one has, is at night, while all others are asleep, or after a hard days work.

But as I brutally force myself to continue waking up at these ungodly hours of the morning to pray and read before I begin getting ready for work, I have found I would not go back to the main quiet time being at night.

First, in the morning, one is going from full sleep, the most unaware state and gradually, with the help of God’s great gift: coffee, into a state of greater awareness. Some may take longer than others, but if you begin with being asleep, you can only ever continue becoming more awake.

Additionally, our culture struggles, including myself, with stewarding time. One of the reasons I miss my quiet time when I save it for the last part of my morning routine, is because I find myself taking too long in finding an outfit to wear or doing my hair, that I steal the minutes of quiet time and end up rushing to work before even glancing at my Bible.

This time, instead, is protected when you make it your first task.

What this also does, is train yourself to not avoid the consequences of your own actions. If you wake up late, you begin quiet time, and end up going to work late, you will think twice about choosing to enjoy those extra 15 minutes of sleep again. Yet, if you wake up, and instead, cut the quiet time for the sake of getting ready on time, you protect yourself from the consequences (being late) that you rightfully deserve. Thus, leading you to justify your bad decisions because the only person who knows you skipped your God time is you and God.

It is hard but it is necessary if you desire to grow. For what you spend your time doing is, and always will be, up to you and your responsibility to be used for God’s glory.

After all, the Lord calls us to take up our cross daily…a cross was a never a comfortable thing to endure. It was one that represented death. And how else does one live as a new creation without putting to death the old flesh and old ways?

One’s “first fruits” are those that are picked before the rest. They are not the leftovers nor the ones picked after one has gotten their filling. They are given first and foremost.

When linking this idea with the responsibility we as Christ followers have to steward our time well, it only makes sense that our every breath should be first devoted to God alone and then to the things He has placed before us.

As everyone’s jobs and mornings look differently, the amount of time one devotes in the morning may look different, as well as where exactly they spend this time at.

But what I have found, is that despite the hour we must leave for work or begin our daily tasks, we can always wake up earlier. Due to my struggle of deep feelings, I cannot get less than a certain amount of sleep or I suffer greatly, so as old as this may make me sound, I try very hard most nights to be asleep by 9-9:30pm so that I can stay around the eight hour mark. This means saying “no” sometimes to late night outings with friends and it means I must steward my nighttime chores and such to be completed by that time. In doing that, it makes less excuses available for me in the morning.

At the end of the day, this is not written in stone nor in scripture. But there is a hunger and desire written on our hearts and deep in our soul that I find, suffers, when we save but a taste of God for the night, as we drift in and out of sleepiness.

My dear friend, in your schedule, you hold the power to determine what kind of God you worship. One of convenience, that you believe you can know deeply through a five minute conversation at night, or the One of the Bible, that which may call for inconvenience, yet will grow you and fill you in ways you never knew your soul needed. Our time is considered one of the most valuable things to us, so where will your first fruits go? How long will you continue trying to mold God around the precious gift in which He gave you?

Thoughts to Consider:

What obstacles are currently preventing more time in community with God?

If you have implemented this practice in your morning, in what ways have you seen growth and what are the distractions pulling you to fall for the temptation of convenience?

How can you reschedule your priorities to protect that time in the presence of God?

Consider the growth your relationship with God could experience and how much your soul has been hungering for greater unity with Him unknowingly.

January Musings – The God of His Word

bible, christian, encouragement

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7

I had a pitiful moment the other day. Just after I had done what some may consider an awesome thing, the same feeling of hopelessness flooded my mind that typically does after I teach others about God.

I cannot tell you what exactly sparks this feeling, but I can assure you that it always comes shortly after God has done something incredible in my life. It is a feeling of “this is far too good to be true”.

And I don’t mean in terms of what I am doing by my own power, but solely in regards to what God has done. Sometimes, if I am honest, it feels as though I have received something He intended for another. Perhaps someone who appreciates all things and can agree that “God is good” to them without a shadow of a doubt.

Unfortunately, as I much as I wish and aspire to be that person, I have yet to get there.

So, after I had taught a group of people about Jesus, I could not handle my thoughts. It was as though a flood of anxiety rushed over my whole body. Paralyzing my every attempt at distracting myself with mindless actions.

As I laid on my bed after work that day, I tried to force my body to get up and do something, anything, to stop the thinking. They were the kind of thoughts that I cannot even communicate into words. All I can describe it as was the very presence of anxiety. The same way I would describe experiencing God as the very presence of peace and hope. This was anything but that.

I raced through ideas of what I could possibly do to force myself – my whole being – to get out of this slump, and suddenly, like a small candle in a pitch black room, one thought containing some hope came to mind. That was to force myself into a posture of surrendering to God.

1 Peter 5:7 was spoken like a whisper breaking painful silence in my heart. So, I ran with it.

I grabbed a book about living for Jesus, put worship music in my air pods, got on my bike and ran out the door.

It was only about 2 songs in until I ran out of energy, as I am not the most fit person in the world, so I parked my bike at a random bench a few blocks from my house and sat down, staring at the grass. It was like the old days. The days in college, where blogs like “Finding Your Quiet Place” was written. It was a place of peace.

And I do not just mean the grassy patch I found, though that was nice. But more so, the space made clear in my heart. I ached for God. As much as I wanted to curl up in a ball and let my anxieties bring me to the place of hopelessness, that I know far too well, something in me knew that wasn’t the place I was in anymore, and it wasn’t a place I would give God room in.

After a couple minutes, I pulled out the book, “Practicing the Way”, (..that I definitely have not been “reading” for like the last year..) and I focused all I could on every word. John Mark Comer is a believer I greatly admire, and though I was intrigued by his writing, it had me pause a lot and realize the way God was moving. Not just in the past, but right now. In this place, on that bench, at that moment.

The suffocating feeling my soul felt from this inexplicable anxiety was slowly being relieved. Not completely gone, but definitely on its way.

I sat there some more, just looking around and realized the problem with our society. Well, if I am being real, the problem with me. Our culture is so loud. And as much as I have been disciplining my actions to stay a safe distance away from this world of distraction, I have hardly focused on my thoughts consistently. Only every so often would I consider the weight of my thoughts in regards to the distraction I experience from God.

There is more to a disciplined life seeking the quiet if your goal is to hear the whisper and experience the nearness of the Lord. It is more than setting restrictions on your social media, setting aside quiet time alone, or making boundaries with those around you. It is about the stillness you allow God to move through in your mind and heart as well. It is about the casting of your worries, your cares, your dreams, your hopes…dear believer, it is the casting of all things that run across your mind. The casting of them to God.

1 Peter 5:7-9 says this:

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.”

I am only going to pull out verse 7 but I thought the surrounding words may be a blessing to read for some.

Verse 7 says that we ought to cast ALL our anxiety on Him. Not because we will die or be smote by Him if we don’t, but simply because He cares for you. And part of the humility spoken in verse 6 is understanding He is more powerful than your anxieties combined. And only when they are placed in His hands, will they be used to bring Him glory and us good.

This verse is intriguing to see in that context because this passage was written for the elders of the Church and their flock. Many would assume that the Christian walk brings you on a smoother path than others, but that is not true, and this verse reveals that. To the people pursuing God, they are told that rather than a smooth journey through life, they will receive the companionship of God Himself in every step of the way. As they walk through this chaotic life of many trials, He is close and He is caring. Hoping we see the beauty and blessing of casting all to Him.

I said I was only focusing on verse 7, but I feel that the one following it is relevant to this point.

In verse 8, it calls believers to be sober minded. This means something along the lines of being free from intoxicating influences. Though that could mean material things, I would argue the could cover internal toxic things as well, such as our thoughts.

Now I am no master at controlling my thoughts. I have grown from where I was, but still there remains a struggle. One of the most common toxic thoughts in my mind is that which I stated at the beginning, “this is far too good to be true”.

When I was growing up, I heard of how powerful and great God was. I heard that we were but sinners unable to do anything truly good without Him. So as I went through life and experienced things, there were moments I felt very uncomfortable. Those were moments of good things. At every award or opportunity received, I would feel good for a second and then hear this voice that weighed me down like a ball and chain…

…”You don’t deserve this. Someone better should be in your shoes. You are a sinner and only deserve Hell”.

This thought became my mindset towards every good thing I was a part of. But what I now know, is that is only half the truth.

Yes. We are all sinners. Technically, we all deserved Hell. That is true. But what is also true is that Jesus Christ paid the price of our sin, so we could run free with Him for eternity.

I had heard what Jesus did for me since I was in 5th grade. But it took believing God is a God of His Word for me to stop the toxic thoughts that the half truth stirred up in my mind. For until I did, my mind was fogged by lies born out of the only truth I believed – that I was a sinner and deserved nothing but Hell.

My dear friend, allowing those lies to grow does not equal a sober mind. For it just leads to the decaying of the hope in your heart and soul. It leads to a life where you think you can control what you cannot and a place of unnecessary hopelessness. Believing in the whole truth, God’s Word, that His sacrifice was enough, does not mean you now deserve goodness. It simply opens your heart up to accepting His grace and living by His will. It makes your whole being available to whatever He calls you to. Not because you deserve, are good enough, or worthy of anything. But simply because He is the God who cares. So take Him at His Word.

Thoughts to Consider:

How would you describe the state of your mind/thoughts/anxieties?

What are the things, in any of area of your life, that you need to cast to God? (Not meaning disregarding things, but giving control of them to God).

List the lies you have been believing, even if they are half-truths, and find scripture that combats them.

Consider the transformation you can have for God if you began believing He was a God of His Word.

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7

December Musings: On What Works

bible, christian, spiritual formation

“Every one of us needs to find our own unique way of reaching the universe of increased awareness. I have come to be quite certain that no one way is any better than another. Whatever leads each of us to our destination of relationship with the Divine Lover, with the central core of meaning in the universe, is the best one for us.” – Reaching by Morton Kelsey

For months, I have been collecting portions of practices from pastors, teachers, and writers on what is considered to be the right way to pray. To go to God in full surrender with a heart that seeks true communion. To come honestly, but never disregarding His authority and the reverence we ought to maintain for Him.

I have personally been seeking this out since I came to Christ, but much more practically recently for the sake of developing some sort of guidance for those just entering the faith.

What I thought was going to be a quick list of ten or so practical tips became an exhaustive journey. What I have found is that prayer is so very simple in terms of doing, yet so complex internally.

It goes far beyond spoken words. It is a practice that requires the attention of the mind, heart, and soul. A practice that prioritizes posture over knowledge. It is not about the fancy words but honesty and humility tied in with confidence in whom you are speaking to.

Perhaps in our pursuit of what is practically correct, we have lost the very point of seeking and have drowned out the sensation of our deep need for our Savior.

These thoughts have been running as I have been trying to form my new year resolutions. Some may scoff at these shallow promises so many make to themselves, but I find them rather important.

The end of things is something God works through. The end of something gives us the opportunity to reflect on why it is ending and why it lasted as long as it did. So as a year comes to an end, I find it to be the perfect time to reflect on the things God has chosen to teach us in the time frame He designed.

Good or bad, from our perspective, is still purposeful. Not to say we will understand or come to know that purpose right now, but to know that is to value each experience. It is to not disregard any moment as one God can’t be glorified in.

This is why I reflect and this is why I make new year resolutions.

That being said, prayer has been on my mind because for nearly the last year, I have written my prayers down each night. It is something I have not done before, or at least consistently. And now that close to a year has passed, I recognize the growth and benefit from it, but I see its limitations as well.

This then led me to seek out more. More practices I could add to my routine to form the perfect or best “quiet time with God”.

In my hunt for new disciplines, I struggled a lot. I came across so many that I either did not understand or could not do without feeling unlike myself.

Then I stumbled across this book. The quote is something similar to what I have heard in Richard Foster’s book, Celebration of Discipline. He warned prior to beginning the description of each spiritual discipline that if we are not careful, we risk becoming fools following routines rather than true seekers of the Lord.

That thought paired with the ideas of Morton Kelsey made me think of what it means to be a seeker of God. One who desires Him. Not just knowledge of or gifts from Him, but simply Him.

As we near the beginning of yet another cycle around the sun, perhaps it is not specific practices or routines we ought to be focused on. Rather, maybe it is about the perspective we have and the heart posture we uphold. One that seeks out God, no matter what that looks like.

Allow me to give you an example. I began writing my prayers in February of 2024. It began well, but a month or so in, I fell into the temptation of pride. Pride in my discipline.

I hadn’t noticed that until I missed a few days and recognized the anger and disappointment I had in myself. The loss of opportunity to communicate with God was not my reason for anger. It was my own failure.

That’s when I changed my approach. I began praying out loud first and once I was nearly done, I would write my prayers down. This was due to my struggle of being too tired or rushed. Some days I managed to verbally pray, but fell asleep before I could write anything down.

If anyone were to look at the dates of my prayer journal, they’d assume I missed a day, but I had not. I simply did what worked in that point in time. Not what was routinely scheduled.

This softened my heart to remember the point of it all. The point being to consistently be in communication with God, not to go through as many journals as I could in a year. It was to draw near to Him and slow down, forcing every one of my senses to focus on my time with Him; my hands wrote words to Him, my eyes envisioned each new word, my smell focused on the paper and ink I am using to communicate with Him, and my hearing dedicated to being sensitive to His quiet voice while I wrote in silence.

This one practice changed over the last year. Not in physical form, but internally. I still write in the same format, with the same type of black pen, in the same cursive, and in the same brand of notebooks as I started with in February. But my purpose for it and value in it has changed as I have stopped worrying about what is the “right” way and started considering what was the way that works.

Works: Not in tangible success, for I honestly don’t even know what that would look like, but in terms of spiritual awareness of who I am speaking to, His character, His heart for me, what His voice is like, and the need I have for Him in my soul.

My dear friend, there are a million different ways people will tell you your prayer life should look like. I have told you a small part of what mine looks like. But I want to remind you the love God has given me for words. The deep value I hold for capturing wild emotions and thoughts into orderly letters. This works for me because of the way God designed me. It may not be beneficial to you at all. And if that is the case, then now, at the end of this year and the beginning of the next, I encourage you to analyze what God has taught you and how you can discipline yourself in a way that grows you close to Him. Not doing a discipline because it is easy or simple or even popular by others. No, rather, doing it because it brings you into deeper communion with the Father. Practice what transforms your whole being into one that is more sensitive to the Spirit and more aware of your need for our savior.

Thoughts to Consider:

What brought growth in your spiritual life in the last year?

What stunted you from drawing closer to God in 2024?

How will you teach your mind to walk into 2025 with a new year perspective/heart posture?

Consider the way God has made you unique and imagine the deeper bond you could have with Him if you allowed Him to speak through the passions and personality He created you with?

“Every one of us needs to find our own unique way of reaching the universe of increased awareness. I have come to be quite certain that no one way is any better than another. Whatever leads each of us to our destination of relationship with the Divine Lover, with the central core of meaning in the universe, is the best one for us.” – Reaching by Morton Kelsey