“Then the Lord said to Moses, ‘Leave this place, you and the people you brought up out of Egypt, and go up to the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, saying, ‘I will give it to your descendants.’ I will send an angel before you and drive out the Canaanites, Amorites, Hittites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way.'” – Exodus 33:1-3

Imagine you were just offered all you have ever dreamed of, but it’s going to cost you Everything…

This is the decision the Israelites had to make as they stood in the Wilderness awaiting further direction from the Lord. And technically, they got it. He would send them to the Promise Land, with all He told Abraham about. They would have travel mercies and even Angelic protection from all who were currently in the land. But they would not have God’s nearness.

The Israelites have rebelled again and again against the Lord. And so in this moment, He directs them to continue on, ensuring He would remain faithful to His promise, despite their disobedience. Honestly, considering how quickly they gave up on Him before, their response was surprising. But it was also what was the best decision they could have made.

They mourned. They refused to go on without the nearness of the One who had led them all this way. It wasn’t about the destination, the land, resources, or physical home. It was about the One whom they found belonging in.

So they did not go.

When I think about my dream of becoming an author, I so easily get wrapped up in the process. The research, practice, and editing takes up so much of my time and attention. Though I pray before, during, and after each blog I write, I still find myself battling what I ought to do when the editing time rolls around.

The moment I hit save draft, my mind is flooded with thoughts like, “Should I say this or that? What are better SEO words? Should I change the photo to be something more people would likely stop scrolling for? What about the length? I included all I felt led to write, but is it too long for people’s attention?”

I wish I could tell you that I don’t struggle with the thought of what others think. But I find it more frequent that I do. I want so badly for someone to stumble across these writings and find hope. But I also know for one to find this blog, my marketing strategy must be somewhat decent.

Although there is nothing wrong with good marketing, sometimes, I struggle as it becomes an idol for me. My writing is changed and my pictures take hours to take or choose as the interests of others becomes my main priority.

Yet, that is not the purpose of this. That is not the purpose of me.

During my senior year of high school, I was given a love and passion to write for the sake of making Jesus not only known, but more visible in daily life to the doubters and critics like myself.

For years, that is what I did. Yet recently, quite a few people have asked me about what I have been writing for my future book(s).

I have beaten around the bush each time because the truth is, I have so much research and ideas and yet the Lord has yet to bring me peace over finalizing any of them. Though I was content with that for years, lately it has ached me to not know why. To not even have an idea of a title that feels approved by God.

But praise Jesus for the humble teachings in Scripture.

I have a degree in communication with a concentration on social media and another one in organizational management. For years now, I have worked for different companies in social media management and marketing. So, you would think I would know something about how to get this blog out there. In fact, in the first 2 years of all this, I think I actually did pretty well. But now, I feel little to no inclination to do so.

Not because I feel unmotivated or lazy. But rather, I feel God has drawn my attention elsewhere. And for good reason. In society today, there is a great emphasis on advertising the moment a talent is discovered. But I fear that should not always be the case. One of the things I love about some musicians, is that you will hear their latest album, and then never hear a word from them for months or even years. But when the next album is released, it is incredibly beautiful. Especially faith-based artists, their lyrics tend to reveal an amazing spiritual journey compared to the last album they let out.

I feel like in this moment, in the Wilderness, the Israelites sort of felt this way. Their dreams were at their fingertips. And they had the path to get there. But their heart knew what it desired most and their soul grieved for the only true source of life and love. So they stayed in the nearness of the Lord.

Their decision was then blessed as their spokesman, Moses, received word from the Lord, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” (v. 15).

What a moment of awe. I am sure there were some nervous and doubtful hearts in the Israelite crowd that looked towards the Promise Land once more and let a few tears trickle down their cheek as they put their last handful of hope in this God. Not that He would lead them down an easy path. But hope in His presence being far more worthy than any ground they could ever call their own.

And in response to their submission and trust, the Lord not only promised His faithfulness in the Abrahamic covenant (getting them to the Promise Land), but He also promised His nearness to them in every step alongside a beautiful thing called rest.

A restless mind is not a pleasant one. To constantly be unsure of the security of one’s love or reliability is quite a difficult way to live. But the Lord promises Moses and Israel that, with Him, there does not have to be any fear that He will abandon, fail, or manipulate them on their journey.

As I sit here, only feeling peace to continue my broad research and write blogs every few weeks, I fight the temptation to take the blessing over the Giver. And though I may some knowledge on how to build my own path to my hearts longings, it all fades away as I remember the worth of Christ over everything else.

So I do not force books or blogs because the world says I ought to for my own glory. But instead, I take the longer route for it is where my God is saying He will go with me. What greater promise could I have than that?

My dear friend, the journey itself was never promised to be easy. The fact that rest is given shows us that there are trials to be expected, yet no need to drown in fear, hopelessness, or anxiousness. Despite the fleeting treasures this world claims you need, as Christ followers, may we recognize that the presence of the Lord and the gifts He gives us are different. May we never lose sight of our true Everything, even for everything else.

Thoughts To Consider:

Is there a dream you feel God gave you that you struggle to have patience for? Why?

Is it the opinions of others, the feeling of failure, the fear of being behind, or something else that pulls you from putting all your trust in God’s timing?

Do you make time to simply hear from God, even if you feel He may be saying something you don’t want to hear?

Consider the beauty you could unravel instead of discouragement when you begin trusting God’s presence is worth giving up your expectations.

“Then the Lord said to Moses, ‘Leave this place, you and the people you brought up out of Egypt, and go up to the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, saying, ‘I will give it to your descendants.’ I will send an angel before you and drive out the Canaanites, Amorites, Hittites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way.'” – Exodus 33:1-3