christian men

On the Significance of God’s Righteousness

bible, Christian lifestyle

“God presented Christ as a sacrifice of atonement, through the shedding of his blood—to be received by faith. He did this to demonstrate his righteousness, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished— he did it to demonstrate his righteousness at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭3‬:‭25‬-‭26‬ ‭

Shame has been on my mind lately. It is an quite an interesting concept when broken down.

Though our bodies have a survival instinct, when shame is present, it is as if we give that up. Rather than fighting for life, we give into fighting ourselves into this belief that we are not worthy of good, and sometimes, not even worthy of life itself.

Shame holds the power to turn a soul against itself.

Now we have heard the value of God’s love preached a million times over. His love is what drove Him to fight for us even when we rejected Him. But what I recently came across was the significance of His righteousness. His justice. The characteristic that demands the virtuous thing. The just thing.

When I read this verse above, it was not just the cost of my sin that seemed to be forgiven, but also the effects of my sin that were overcome.

Yes, God loves us, and we can rest in that truth. But God also demonstrated His justice on the cross and through the empty tomb.

The cross paid the debt. The cost of our wrongdoings. The punishment we were responsible for.

And the empty tomb revealed that death, and it’s grip on our lives, has no power over those redeemed by Christ.

My dear friend, shame speaks death that has already been defeated. It is rooted in a punishment that has already been paid. And it bounds us in chains that are already broken.

The sacrifice and resurrection was not just the perfect display of love, but the perfect act of righteousness for the sake of making freedom available to those who did not deserve it.

Shame will come often. And as our hearts tends to forget the significance of God’s righteousness, shame tends to distract us from the reality we now live in; the reality of redemption and grace.

This is not that we may walk in our own pride, as Paul says in verse 27, “Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded.”

No, rather, we walk in confidence of the perfect atonement for our sins – being just that…perfect. Forgiveness for our straying, and freedom for our bounded souls.

February Musings: Reflection Of Luke’s Gospel

bible, Christian lifestyle, encouragement

“Why do you look for the living among the dead?” – Luke 24:5

I finished reading the Gospel of Luke two days ago. Though there were so many rich parts, this stopped me in my tracks for quite a while.

Over the last two years, I have prayed more than ever for a change. Not so much in the circumstances of life, but in my heart. Yet month after month, I felt despair gain it’s grip on my spirit. I thought, surely, this cannot be what God desires. I was told He fights for me. He loves me. He faced death for me. Yet what I endured, honestly tempted me to doubt all of that. It began seeming as though His grace did in fact have a boundary, and justifiably so, I stood just inches outside of it.

The reason I read Luke was because I knew a LOT about the Bible. I know a lot about the old testament, the history, context, and timeline of it all, but my relationship with God felt no deeper than that between a history teacher and I. I learned through what His Word said. I grew excitement over the stories that were told. But as a teacher holds a higher, distant relationship with their students, the more I learned, the more I felt the firmness of those walls between us.

Reading Luke without any commentary or elders walking me through it, I saw God in a new light.

[ I want to be honest in the reality of my struggle though. As I type this out, praying I word this correctly, in a way that points to the glory of the Lord like I want it to, I fight with myself. I fight still with the thoughts I had before reading Luke and I fight with the fear that what I say now may not highlight something that lasts. Though perhaps that is just what life is; a constant battle to choose Jesus over all else, even if our new knowledge does not erase our old feelings. ]

The new light I saw God in was not a feeling, though it is often classified as one. My dear friend, what I saw was God as Love.

I saw Jesus fight for our spirit (4:35), be patient in our frustration (5: 10), comfort us in sorrow (7:13), defend us in our brokenness (7:47), call us towards Him (10:42), rejoice over our return (15:5), relentlessly pursue us (19:10), delight in eternity with us (23:43), and my personal favorite…I saw Jesus willingly reach for us despite all we are (5:13).

Yet even after all I saw, my heart stumbles in confidence as I try to believe I am included in those He fights for.

Though just as real as my feelings are, the resurrection of Jesus is too. The only difference is that one lasts in truth and one lies in shame that has already been overcome.

By the grace of God, we get to choose how we walk in life.

But one thing you must understand is that your choice in how you walk determines everything…and there is no grey area. You either choose to walk in life or death. In no place will you find them truly co-existing. You may trip in your pursuit of life, but that does not mean you change your direction. The beauty of God’s mercy is that we get to walk in life even as broken people. Actually, what is even more fascinating than that, is that God Himself promises to walk that path WITH us.

Luke 24:5 was the response of the Angels standing outside of Jesus’ tomb when the women went to visit. “Why do you look for the living among the dead?” they said.

We may see this and think, “Of course, only a fool would expect life from a casket.” But do we not do that very same thing as we pray God cultivates life-giving fruit while we live with a mindset and walk that feeds death?

If there is anything I desire for you from the journey through Luke, it is that you long to know God over all else.

For when you pursue the One who is Life and Love, you will only find more truth to defend against your death-seeking nature. The things of Heaven bear what lasts. Over feelings. Over hardships. Over sorrow. Over confusion. Over all sin, is the consistent conquering of Love.

The resurrection was enough. It has to be. And as much as you may fight it, as I do quite often, it always will be enough. So why, my dear friend, are you seeking glimpses of life from anything else? For only a fool seeks life while watering what is dead.

Musings: January

Christian lifestyle, prayer, Worship

At the end of last year, I was struggling a lot. I feared the path in which I was on would no longer be sustainable. The way I was living was not one that seemed connected to this abundant source of life God claimed to be.

I needed something new. And I needed it soon. For all that I knew was running dry and falling short of being enough. The perspective I had was losing root. I become unbearably drained.

As the weeks went on, the war in my mind between what struggle was worth my efforts got more intense. Living life with God is hard. But so is existing without Him.

So I decided to beg.

Slightly embarrassed, I made the decision that the 8 hour car ride alone to this conference I had to go to would be dedicated to pressing God for a word. Not a specific answer to all my problems. Not a vision. Not a miracle. Just a word. One that would help me understand why the Holy Spirit continued to fight my spirit of doubt in my heart.

After 8 long hours, I felt nothing. I had no revelation. And in all honesty, I was disappointed. If that extensive dedication was not enough, what would ever be?

The first night of that conference ended and I went to bed with little hope for the coming day.

I fought worship the next day to be honest. In a room full of 55,000 young people passionately praising God, you would think I was insane to not feel the heat. Yet, I didn’t.

But for some reason, I was compelled to force my body to physically do what my heart refused. I lifted my hands with palms down in surrender and then palms up for reception. This was hard. But then I heard it…

From death to life.

That was it. No further explanation. (Perhaps I should’ve asked God for at least a full sentence). But nonetheless, I knew it was not from me, because simply “life” was the last thing I would’ve told myself was enough to satisfy my desire for a new thing.

It was as if the speakers heard that same phrase, because nearly every message after that had a point or two about that perspective.

From death to life, I repeated.

So short, yet so profound. I spent months trying to figure out what I was feeling and I dodged all descriptions that sounded too far from the bounds of God’s grace. Because, though I struggle to understand His uniquely intentional love for us, I knew if I admitted I felt unredeemable, what then would have the power to pull me back into this “hope” we are called to live in?

Then someone read 1 Corinthians 5: 17-21 to me.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.”

There is a LOT we could pull from this, but track with me for just a moment.

Sin is in fact what God cannot be in the presence of. For it is all He goes against and the opposite of who He is. The price for it is death. Death is the absence of life. As God is life, that means for one to be dead, they are not connected with God. (Speaking in a spiritual sense here).

This, my friend, is why I fought so hard to identify with anything but dead. For it is the place outside His presence.

I was living with a perspective slowly withering away from God’s truth and instead, making root in the enemy’s territory. I believed the true severity of sin, so I caved when I heard the lies that God would not reach as far as I felt.

But praise God for His written Word.

What we see here in 1 Corinthians, is the beauty of His boundless love. A love so passionate that the grave was not too scary to face nor too powerful to keep Him chained.

Jesus endured death to life, testifying no other force could overcome and no place was too far, even that which was supposed to remain apart from Him.

He did it for me and He did it for you.

My dear friend, there is no place more distant than death, and even still, God extends His hand. He meets us where we are. And He calls us to respond through living. To give up all the life-stripping habits we know and to take on what He offers as we are covered in the grace of Jesus’ sacrifice.

From death to life.

This world is hard to endure, but when it seems as though “life” has run its worth, we have only just discovered the true meaning and value behind that four letter word.

Heavenly Father, teach our weary souls to take on the new, true, perspective of life as we let go of everything else that goes against. Let all we are and do become whole-hearted worship for You, oh Lord.

Simply Yours, Oh Lord

Christian lifestyle, encouragement, prayer

“My hard heart breaks to confess, that even while you hold me as I cry on the floor, I still don’t know how to be yours…” – Chris Renzema

At one point in my stumble towards Christ, I came to a place where I could not bear to pray. The thought of God not only listening, but deeply caring about my life seemed too good to be true after how bad my doubts began to get. So, I ignored Him.

More than I wanted to be healed, I was afraid of being disappointed. The fear of reality being true to what my worrisome mindset envisioned, made me turn anywhere besides the direction of the One who had a justified reason to give up on me.

The other day I had to honor of attending a concert by Chris Renzema. I heard the song quoted above a million times before. Many times, these words actually filled the silence in my prayers when I could not bring myself to say what I wanted.

Or perhaps that was what I wanted to say all along.

About a year and a half ago, I came across the definition of lamenting. A practice done by many in Old Testament times. As someone who thought God would be upset the more I let myself sit in my feelings, this was transformative to hear.

Lamenting, in the words of Bethany H. Hoang and Kristen Deede Johnson, is prayer “that honors the honesty of pain and anger while also honoring the truth that God is the one who reigns and whose hesed love never fails.”

“Come As You Are” – For the Non & Life-Long Believers
“Come As You Are” goes deeper into the practice of lamenting and touches on Psalm 88.

It wasn’t until I was standing in that massive room with hundreds of people singing the words quoted by Chris Renzema that it hit me…

So many people don’t know how to accept the love God so freely offers. They, or we, don’t know how to be His.

It broke my heart to think about the pain behind each person’s voice singing those lyrics, but then Chris Renzema did something I failed to do every time I heard this song before.

He honored the truth of God and His unconditional love. With songs of praise, words of truth, and the turning of his feelings towards God, I found the missing piece. The flaw in my sulking. The crack in the grip depression held over me…

Addison Bevere once said, “Merely running in the opposite direction of a lie does not necessary lead us to the Father’s house of Truth.”

When we feel the weight of an anxious mind telling us lies about God, we ought not run from feelings as a whole. For we will only ever become a numb being. No, we must instead run, stumble, crawl, whatever it takes, towards God. By the blood of Christ, our identity, purpose, and freedom overcame death and all the lies that once lead you to be nothing more than a dead man walking.

My dear friend, you may not know how to be His. Even I still struggle as I retreat to the heart-style of an orphan. But at some point, we must recognize the life of a child of God calls for the renewing of our mind, body, and soul.

How much longer must we allow our hopelessness to be louder than our God? Our insecurity greater than the blood Jesus spilled? Or our fear stronger than the One who left the empty grave and broken chains?

Prayer, when you feel like a disappointment, is hard. Reading the Bible when you feel unworthy is gut-wrenching. And walking in faith when you have twice as much doubt is dreadful. But all of these turn our feelings, that were designed by God, towards Him so that they may honor Him and He may work His goodness through them.

For when we don’t know how to be…He who is, is faithful indeed.

Daily Death For Eternal Life

bible, Christian lifestyle, encouragement

“Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done.” – C. S. Lewis

I think the mind can often draw us towards two extreme ways of thinking. Either we fall into a place where we see ourselves as god, or we see the things, people, and opinions around us as god. Both, despite sounding like polar opposites, are ultimately places of pride.

Whether we feel inferior or superior in the world we live in, we are constantly being pulled away from the one place we belong, and in turn, tempted to rely on anything BUT God.

I think what makes the idea of living in humble confidence under God so difficult to wrap our minds around completely is because we are called to be surrendered, and in result, raised up and set apart.

When I stumbled across this quote by C.S Lewis, I was honestly not sure how to approach it.

Not having the original context, I struggled to understand if it we ought to take this as a freedom call, from the shame and bondage of sin from our past that we are attacked by, or perhaps, it is meant to be a daily call of repentance from the pride we are tempted to lean into as we long for ultimate control of our lives.

Though I feel both could be broken down, I am going to run with the latter interpretation.

I have heard the saying “rejoice, mercies are new every morning!” as Lamentations 3:22-23 suggest. But lately I have been wondering why we ought to rest in that so much.

Honestly, I have come to notice that I am quite the cautious believer. I don’t take pride in the lack of child-like faith I have, but it is the way my mind works. So, I rather challenge the lies in my head and be sure of truth than try to manipulate myself when I know my brain requires a little more time to catch up to my heart.

So as this verse had been running through my head over the last few weeks, I realized it wasn’t because I felt inspired in my faith by it…no, unfortunately, I actually felt aggravated.

Mercy from God? Okay, I saw that displayed on the cross. Understandable. But NEW mercies. Every. Single. Day? Trying to believe that stirred nothing but guilt. I began feeling the weight of inadequacy, and because of that, a lack of faith that the verse actually included me among those who God desired to forgive.

But then I saw this quote from C.S Lewis that rocked everything.

“Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done.”

God provides new mercies every morning because He knew we would need it.

Track with me here…

Our heart longs for what only God provides. But because of our sin-nature of pride and hunger for immediate satisfaction, we sacrifice God’s plans for our own. We may not notice at first, but that decision means that we sacrifice life for death.

Death is existence apart from God. In a just court, we would be ruled guilty of rejecting Him and in turn, rightfully condemned.

Oh but what a loving God we serve…

Paving a way to be free from the ruling of death, by the sacrifice of Jesus, God revealed His grace on the cross.

But He knew that wouldn’t mean perfection for our future, nor did He expect it to on this side of Heaven.

He knew, that because of our brokenness, there would be times where we would still choose ourselves over Him.

He knew, that even though we love Him, we would cave under the temptation to reject Him.

And He knew, that no matter how hard we tried, we would never be strong enough to live the life He called us to alone.

So God gives new mercies…every single morning. Why? Because He knew we would experience new temptations…every single morning.

When C.S Lewis calls us to rely on Jesus as if nothing had yet been done, I realize it is a call to open our eyes to the reality of the war going on every single day.

Every day we are given the choice of life or death. Truth or lies. Forgiveness or bitterness. Love or shame. Trust or control.

Spiritual warfare is not just in big trials. It is unfortunately the ground our hearts reside in until we see Heaven.

My dear friend, you have your choice in battle. You have a loving God who wants to protect, nourish, and redeem you in this war, for He has already claimed victory.

But the choice is yours. Every. Single. Day.

May we never get complacent in our relationship with Jesus. May we strive, for nothing else, but to be closer to Him day by day. And with all my heart, I pray that we may rejoice in His mercies being new every morning…for if He held back for even just one day, we would never see the glory of true life.

So, will you make relying on God a daily act of surrender?