Christian Girl

The Danger of Little Depth

christian, lifestyle, prayer

“But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few will find it.” – Matthew 7:14

Over the last year, I have been considering the true depth of my faith and relationship with God more than ever before. Unfortunately, however, it was not until recently I understood the value of diving that deep. In fear of either disappointment or a crumbled pride, I pushed away the potential of not being as close to God as I thought, which in turn, lead to a spiral of self-loathing. Though in this search, He who is faithful has done nothing but reveal His sweet and compassionate character time and time again.

Matthew 7:7 begins a section on the opportunity we as believers have to seek from God with confidence. Of course recognizing His authority over ours first, this scripture describes the desire God has for us to ask, seek, and knock. Like a child in awe, yet confused of the world around them, we have the freedom to bring our concerns to God. And like a loving father who reveals truth with grace, so our God does with us.

Deconstruction of the faith has been a topic recently repeated by those around me. Though, not in the way it is commonly known. Rather than the layered demolition of one’s belief in God, I have been contemplating the potentially beautiful outcome of something like deconstruction, but with the goal of developing a more genuine personal faith. I feel as though questions in the Church and amongst our Christian friends have been iced over with superficial encouragement or peer-pressured manipulation to believe in something your mind considers unreasonable in every sense.

This journey I am looking into, and softly challenging you to, is not just asking your general questions you could google and answer in 3 sentences. No. My dear friend, I am speaking about the deep, honest search of our heart, soul, and mind that breaks through strongholds, lights up our hidden doubts, and reveals our greatest fears. This, I have come to believe, may be the kind of journey that brings a freedom we never knew existed. And honestly, perhaps the life we were made to live.

Fear of disappointment may be what prevents us from moving towards this in-depth search through our faith. But if God is who He claims and the sacrifice Christ made for us was enough, this kind journey will only lead to a better understanding our ourselves, God’s heart for us, and an even greater perspective of His faithfulness.

The passage after the one about seeking begins in Matthew 7:13 and reveals one of the most motivational (in my opinion) set of verses for taking on this specific challenge. Questions and honesty in our misunderstanding’s may be swept under the mat by those around you, but I do not believe the placement of these verses was a coincidence.

Just as Jesus explains the way in which we ought to come to Him with honesty, regardless of where we are in our walk, He goes on to reveal a critical note for those who claim to follow Him…

“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” – Matthew 7:13-14

Note that the difference between those who go through the broad gate vs the narrow is that they simply enter through the broad, but must find the narrow.

The cost of living for Jesus is dying to ourselves. Why? Because all that we are without Him is sinful. Our flesh longs for immediate satisfaction and ruthless pride. And unfortunately, our world has normalized it to where we so often overlook it’s traces that run deep within our hearts.

My dear friend, it is a tough journey because it is a convicting and humbling one. But it is better to cultivate an authentic faith that leads to life than one requiring no deeper thought as you follow the crowd on the road to destruction.

Intentionally Interruptible – Part 2

bible, christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement, lifestyle, prayer, Worship

When God speaks, how confidently do you listen?

This past week I spent my time in a foreign land. Though incredible, my heart faced one of the most spiritually refining moments it has had in a while. Time after time, I stumbled into situations that called for a new perspective and humble obedience. These scenarios required genuine listening. The kind of listening that you not only seek understanding for and prayerfully discern, but the kind that you feel compelled to follow through with in faith-driven confidence.

The trip I went on was one that required a lot of flexibility. The daily plans were not extremely clear until the day before and the stories we heard from others were unimaginable. To say the least, this was a trip full of the unexpected. I knew that very well before I ever signed up for it, and before going, I even prayed God would keep it unpredictable. But when each new day arose, I struggled to properly get my heart prepared.

As you may know, I am a heavy-duty planner. I thrive in routine and consistency. But as I was on the first flight, I heard this song called, “When you walk into the room” by Bryan and Katie Torwalt. The lyrics go a little like this:

When You walk into the room
Everything changes
Darkness starts to tremble
At the light that You bring
And when You walk into the room
Every heart starts burning
And nothing matters more

When You walk into the room
Sickness starts to vanish
Every hopeless situation ceases to exist
And when You walk into the room
The dead begin to rise
‘Cause there is resurrection life in all You do

Moral of the message, when God enters a situation, the unexpected in bound to happen. But the good kind of unexpected. The kind that brings light and life in ways we could’ve never fathomed. But what I have come to realize on this trip is that we must hunger for the heart and perspective of the Father if we wish to see the same goodness He sees in the “unplanned”. We must live intentionally interruptible. Not only by our neighbors as I discussed in part 1 of this series, but also by God and the unpaved, yet beautiful, roads He wants to take us on.

There were many accounts in this week that left me in baffled positions. I didn’t know what to say, do, or how to turn something into a good and glorifying thing. But on the first flight to my destination, I challenged myself to pray through. Praying through is something Mark Batterson often promotes in his book “Circle Maker”. It is when one prays with a humility in their humanity and a strong confidence in their God. It is when you choose to praise God for His faithfulness in the past as well as the faithfulness He promises to hold in the future regardless of how long the waiting takes. So in each and every moment of anxiety, confusion, heartache, frustration, and impatience, I prayed through.

I refused to allow my circumstances cloud the miracles and wonders God was unraveling in the unexpected. This called for proper lamenting. To lament is to be completely honest in your feelings but never dismissing the authority of God. As I said before, I love good consistency, and thank heavens, God is just that. In His unchanging character, we are able to find rest and peace that even though the world may sprout out a million crazy scenarios, when we tune into the guidance of the Lord, He will help us see how He turns it for our good and His glory. But again, I emphasize the honesty of your feelings. Without this, there can be no change in the position or perspective of your heart because in an attempt to “have it all together”, you build walls between God and the most vulnerable parts of your heart. Vulnerability is what allows growth to occur. And with growth, comes peaceful availability as you begin to become more comfortable with your life laying fully in the hands of the Father.

But PLEASE understand I am not saying this is easy. I told you earlier that this week was a big spiritually refining moment in my life. And believe me when I say, refining is no easy or fun task. Like a sword being welded, the fire is always hot and the molding is always extremely uncomfortable. But the end result is nothing short of beautiful. This is the process I experienced, not once, twice, or even just three times, but probably around once every day on this trip. It was humbling, but also freeing.

To know that we do NOT have to have it all in our own control and to know that even in the unexpected, our God remains consistent in His character, there is a peace unlike any other that begins to cultivate in your heart. Making each new refinement, not always less painful, but most definitely more hopeful.

So my dear friend, as you challenge yourself to pray through, lament, and respond in a faithful confidence (again, in the Lord’s power, not your own), I assure you it will be a greater blessing than a hardship. We must not underestimate the power of responding to the voice of God with a genuinely listening heart and soul. Your mind can run a million miles an hour in times of anxiety, frustration, confusion, etc. Do not let that be what drives your actions.

We are called followers of Jesus for a reason. Followers obey. But to do so correctly, they must listen and trust. May hunger for the Father flood your heart and may it mold you in a way that establishes a life eager for the unexpected. I pray you come to a point where you can confidently predict God to be unpredictable in your every day life. So Christian, again I ask you, how confidently do you listen to God when He speaks? Are you willing to make the changes in your heart that turn your life into one that thrives in the interruptions of the Father?

Ruthless Faith

bible, christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement, lifestyle

As I sit in this middle row seat of a plane and stare out into the night sky after a two-day conference that I thought would make me feel exhausted from being rushed and packed to the brim with the late night and early morning schedule, I find myself in the completely opposite position. I feel relaxed, restored, and refilled. Don’t get me wrong, I was expecting to be filled by the Christian speakers, but the filling I thought I’d receive was more knowledge and discipline based versus the wisdom and…conviction, yes, but also encouraged fullness I feel now.

How interesting that slow is so foreign to me. As I sat at the conference and watched the “quick thirty minute break” become more like a forty five minute intermission, I realized that when there is fruit being produced, like there was in the deep conversations being had between the hundreds of sisters in Christ, rush and hurry becomes so distasteful. Yet it was how I lived out almost every one of my days.

It is in this moment that I realize what it may take to not just decently defend, but to attack and overcome the lies of the enemy.

Ruthless faith.

Scripture tells us that’s the devil watches and prowls around us like a vicious lion staring at little Bambi after a hot summer day and a growling stomach. So if the enemy tempts, plans against, and attacks us ruthlessly, is the only way to claim victory to be ruthless back?

In Exodus 3, God gives directions to the Israelites on how to literally “plunder” the Egyptians. Sounds pretty ruthless to me, but if it’s from God, we should consider why it was necessary.

The Egyptians were initially living right beside the Israelites without an issue. That was until they began growing (aka. fulfilling Gods promise of becoming as numerous as the stars). When the Egyptians realized the power of the Israelites numbers, they began enslaving them. Hmm. Sound familiar?

When we begin pursuing God’s will in our lives, it is not uncommon that we also begin facing some pretty harsh attacks from the enemy. And sometimes, he will do it in the most subtle ways possible. It starts with a busier schedule, a sickness, or maybe a big fork in the road with no clear direction. Whatever it may be, it is intended to distract you from God.

So how exactly does God guide the Israelites to respond to such a ruthless attack? Well, as we see in verse 22, He calls them to plunder. But not in the way you may be thinking.

When God says “so you shall plunder the Egyptians”, He first says, that because of the hardship their enemy will give them, He will stretch His hand over them and drop some miraculous wonders. So if this was in a step order; step one is to step back, listen, and watch God as you invite Him into your circumstance.

Once He claimed to take the first action, He promises redemption and provision in verses 19-20. So here’s your second step; pursue a confidence in God’s faithfulness through reading His word, praying, and replacing your doubts with His truth. You cannot have faith in the promises you never read about.

And the last thing God says to do in order to plunder the enemy is to walk out in faith. He calls the Israelite women to wholeheartedly trust that He has brought compassion into the Egyptians hearts and because of that, He tells them to boldly ask those Egyptians; not for water or something understandable like some new sandals for the trek their about to make. Nope. God tells them to ask for silver, gold, and clothing. Crazy, I know. But there’s your last step; walk boldly in the promise of God, even when it seems insane and unlikely to lead to success.

That my dear friends is how you ruthlessly plunder the enemy. Empty yourself in humility and replace your doubt, anxiety, loneliness, depression, pride, and fear with a confidence in Christ. Listen intently, wait on your cue, build up a truth-centered faith, and walk confidently in the faithfulness of your all-loving God.

If there’s anything I learned on this trip, it is how easy we let the enemy fill our lives with distraction after distraction in the mask of productivity. I experienced fruit during the slow…something I was always taught was impossible. Now I can never look at my days the same after getting a glimpse of freedom.

How bad do you want to live in the way God intended you to? Be ruthless, but ruthlessly biblical.

If It’s Not Finished Yet, It’s Gonna Be – God Moves Us From Glory To Glory

bible, christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement

“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.“

– 2 Corinthians 3:18

The other day I was baking snickerdoodle cookies for the first time ever. As I was trying so hard to make the dough just right and perfectly cover the small balls with cinnamon, I began thinking about the baking process as a whole.

In order for the outcome to be delicious, the baker must carefully gather and mix loads of different ingredients to transform into a sweet taste. They then must bake the cookies with such care that they do not leave them in the oven for too long or take them out too early. Once the cookies are seemingly baked to perfection, they then must let them sit on the tray for a little while to cool down and harden to just the right crunch to gooey ratio before serving them.

I know right. It sounds so much more intense than the cute Pinterest pictures tend to portray. But what interests me the most is the relation between baking cookies and what living for God looks like.

If you put yourself in the shoes of those cookies, you will realize that there is so much trust you have to give the baker if you want to become a delicious, warm, and sweet snack. In that same way, we as Christians are responsible for letting God have our trust if we desire to be made into the new creation scripture tells us about.

We have to trust that God will bring us from glory to glory.

I was reading into the actual meaning Paul had when He wrote about this in 2 Corinthians and…wowza. It turns out, it is not simply a saying; to bring hope that God will use your different seasons for His eventual glory, but that He promises to make us new, free, and able to form a personal relationship with Him.

The glory He brings us from is that of the old testament, the law of Moses. This law brought much fear and despair among the people because it leveled the ground, making us all equal sinners, worthy of nothing but death. Believers were then left to rely NOT on their obedience to the law, but their faith and trust that God would accept their sacrifices as a covering for their sins. The point of the law was not to change a person or personally bring them closer to God, but to bring awareness to our sin and desperate need to submit to the authority of the Lord.

Thankfully, God opened a new door through the death of His son.

Now I am not saying we no longer have to obey the 10 commandments. They are still important and after one is saved, we should be compelled to follow them out of our love and gratitude for God. But the glory that God is moving us to, is one that brings life instead of fear.

The new covenant, salvation through Jesus, is a game changer. Although it shows us our flaws and need for God just as much as the old covenant did, it also brings forgiveness and an opportunity to personally connect with God through the Holy Spirit that now lives in every believer. And with the Holy Spirit comes this beautiful thing called transformation.

As a baker collects the ingredients for a cookie, the only difference between the dough and the sweet treat on someone’s plate is the change that happens in the oven. A cookie is not terrible if it’s not cooked (aside from the salmonella you could get from the raw egg, but ignore that for the sake of my analogy). BUT it is not in the complete form that the baker intended for it to become. The power of the oven is what transforms the dough into the beautiful cookie. But as we know, an oven is hot. That dough endures loads of pressure and heat before it reaches its complete form.

We often believe that with God, our lives should be a breeze. But that is not true. Just because God’s plans for us are promised to be good, does not mean they will be easy.

Growing up, I came to understand very well that what the world offers tends to sound like the easy way out of situations. And a lot of times, I still struggle to fully submit to God’s way because I desire the instant gratification that sin brings. Because of this, when the Holy Spirit tries to guide me to the righteous path, it can be uncomfortable. My brain will understand why the Holy Spirit is right, but my heart will lean towards temptation, making me feel under pressure and heat just like the dough in the oven.

But after each time God reveals why He lead me somewhere, I understand why the transformation was necessary, just as I am sure the cookie thinks about his time in the oven after it is dipped in a nice, tall glass of milk and enjoyed by a family. Both of us then see how the Baker/Maker knew best all along.

So as we go about our lives and sing about how God brings us from glory to GLORY, I hope you really sit and think about what transformation the Holy Spirit is doing in you this season like the oven is doing to the dough. We ought to not miss out on the millions of ways we can be Christ-like every day. Take advantage of the closeness God is seeking to form with you as you slowly become more and more like the person He designed you to be.

What a great joy it is to be transformed. And what a greater joy it is to get to know the “Baker” of our lives so well. Listen to me my dear friend, if it is not finished yet…believe me, it’s gonna be…and it’s gonna be amazing!! Trust that God will bring you from glory to glory in every season of your life. He makes all things beautiful. It is just a matter of time. Let the Baker mold you into the creation you were made to become.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” -2 Corinthians 5:17

Praise Will Be My Song

christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement

For the past month or so, the story of Joseph has been popping up in conversation, sermons, devotionals, books, etc. I mean, we even taught it to the kids at Vacation Bible School last week. With that, I figured God must have had some clever role to play in all of this.

I have heard the story a billion times before. Often, when we hear the name Joseph in the Bible, a story of great forgiveness tends to be tied with it. However, recently, I have acquired another perspective. Don’t get me wrong, I believe it is one of the greatest stories of how we ought to forgive others, but what I find equally intriguing is the massive heart of praise this boy has.

Quick Recap in case you never heard it or you don’t remember it:

Joseph is the 2nd youngest son of 12 (Abraham’s GREAT grandsons). The brothers got jealous because he was the favorite, so they sold him into slavery in Egypt. This dude named Potiphar became his slave master. Potiphar’s wife tried to sleep with Joseph but he refused to do so. So the wife said he started it all and sent people out to find and arrest him. He ended up in prison next to the Pharaoh’s cupbearer and baker. One day they had weird dreams and were seeking interpretation. God blessed Joseph with the ability to understand them and he told them the meanings of the dreams. Three days later, the baker was killed but the cupbearer was freed. Joseph told the cupbearer to please remember to mention him to the Pharaoh so he could potentially be freed too, but the guy completely forgot about Joseph after he was released. So Joseph sat in the prison for 2 more years. Then randomly, the Pharaoh had weird dreams too. He was looking for someone to interpret them and FINALLY, the cupbearer remembered Joseph and because he could interpret the dreams, the Pharaoh put him in charge as 2nd in command. His duty was to store food for the coming famine the Pharaoh had dreamed about. When the famine hit, low and behold, Josephs’ brothers came searching for food from Egypt because they had so much stored up. And to know what happens next, you are going to need to read Genesis 42 and on because I am only going to really cover the beginning and middle section in this blog.

So as you saw in the recap, Joseph endured some crazy circumstances. Being sold into slavery by your own family is wild enough, but to then be sent to prison for something you didn’t do, and forgotten about after your friend found their own freedom…insane.

It is not uncommon we find ourselves in seasons of our lives we never could’ve imagined we’d be in. But time and time again, we enter a new chapter that seems confusing and hopeless.

For me, if you read any of my past blogs, you could tell that the last year has not been easy in the slightest. And to add a cherry on top of all of that, I most recently lost my best friend.

My first reaction to this, and most things that don’t go my way, was to give up hope in all things. And I mean it in every sense. My coping mechanism is to seclude myself to my room and not speak to anyone unless absolutely necessary. But that is not what God intended me to do with this new season He called me in. Let’s just say, He made that very clear through the conviction I got during any sermon or devotional I thought would tell me “it’s okay to stay that way”.

After realizing I had to actually do something besides sulk, I figured I would do what everyone on social media says; “focus on your personal growth and healing”. That lasted about a week. It honestly caused more confusion than I ever remember experiencing in my life.

For a while, I thought that this failed pursuit of healing meant it would never come. So I simply numbed it out and decided to proceed with the plans I made a few months ago in order to make my summer feel productive. Yet not even that was the right move.

It wasn’t until I recognized the need to truly lay it all down before God and wait on His guidance that some form of growth actually began. (Hence the inspiration of last week’s blog).

I am not going to lie though, I felt stuck. Not feeling any more healed than before. Not finding any more clarity in my next step. The only difference was simply submitting to what I “knew” instead of what I “felt” was the right thing to do.

I am sure Joseph had his times of despair. Verses like Genesis 39:2, where scripture says God was with Joseph so he prospered in his slave master’s house is proof of the hardships life throws at us, but also God’s faithfulness. He never promised us an easy life, but He does promise to be there with us through it all. So as Joseph endured a season of slavery and a season of imprisonment, we can be sure it was no easy task. Considering his desire for the cupbearer to remember him when he is released goes to show that it was not a place in which he enjoyed being.

Yet not once did his circumstance determine his praise.

I want to clear the air that praising God is not strictly singing songs to Him. We praise God through our obedience to Him. And as God commanded us to respect the authority in which we have over us, Joseph obeyed by serving his master well. He also obeyed by refusing to sleep with Potiphar’s wife. And again he obeyed as God called him to interpret the dreams of his fellow prisoners, even if it meant they would no longer be locked up, but he would for another 2 years. Again and again, Joseph chose faith over feelings. He chose to let praise be his song in the suffering, heartache, and hopelessness.

We as humans were designed to bring praise to God. It is through this that we find fulfillment. Whether we get drowned by fear, anxiety, depression, or just a straight up bad year (I am sure we have all had one of those), quit pursuing healing. Rather, passionately pursue the Healer Himself.

It has not been an easy decision for me to let go of the mindset that immediate healing is a right. It has not been easy for me to trust that as I focus on God, His desires for greater things will become what I too long for. And my golly, it has definitely not been easy to sing to Him when all I can manage to get out is the cry of a hurting heart. But praise MUST be our song.

Until we realize that life is not about us, rather, how much we can glorify God, we will never experience the fullness of all He is as our maker, healer, savior, unshakable joy, eternal hope, and so much more.

Please do not let the darkness of your prison prevent you from finding the purpose God has set out for you. There is a reason for every season. Sometimes, we will never know what exactly that is until a few chapter’s in the future, but regardless of your placement on the mountain or in the valley, remember that our hope cannot be crushed or stolen.

I say this often, but I believe it is a good reminder; our heart will endure many pains and trials in life but where better to let it rest than in the hands of it’s maker? The fact that He willingly offered His Son so that we may be able to build a relationship with Him after our own sin condemned us apart makes Him completely worthy of our praise. I thank God that our hope stands victorious over death’s grave. I do not know where you are at in life…but what will be your song?

“The LORD is my strength and my song, and He has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise Him, my father’s God, and I will exalt Him.”

Exodus 15:2