encouragement

The Gentleness of Jehovah Jireh

bible, christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement, Worship

Burnout. I am sure that is a familiar feeling many of us have experienced at some point in our lives. As the responsibilities, classes, workload, bills, and expectations from others pile up so high beyond our vision, there comes a time where the way things are can no longer continue without paying the cost of ourselves. Whether it be our health, time, or sanity, we often trade in a hefty portion of our beings out of fear or for the burden of control.

But what happens when the pile begins to lean? We lose grip. Despite our desire to maintain held together, the weight has become unbearable. We fall. And we fall hard.

The contents in this pile may be from the Lord. They may have been given with great clarity and have resulted in much fruit. But as time went on and our arms began to shake, at just a whisper of temptation and deceit from the enemy, the stack of good things trembles as our fear takes over.

This, my friend, is not a feeling only you have felt. Flip back to 1 Kings 18 and 19 with me…

Elijah, a great prophet of the Lord, faced seemingly one of the hardest days of his life. But surprisingly, it did not follow a trial, loss, or anything of the sort. Rather, it came just after one of the greatest showdowns in history. In chapter 18, Elijah goes to Israel to correct those worshiping foreign deities (baal). In doing so, the prophets of these gods came face to face with Elijah on Mount Carmel to have a challenge. Whichever deity brought fire on the altar they made was the one who they deemed worthy to worship. Long story short, baal did not even make the wind warm, meanwhile God brought a fire so powerful that it engulfed the trench of water surrounding it.

After an awe-striking event like the one just described, you would assume that Elijah was not only amazed, but joyful over the power and faithfulness of his God. But such was not the case.

At the beginning of chapter 19, Elijah is threatened to be hunted and killed by an evil lady named Jezebel. Even after such an incredible act of God, Elijah was fearful. So much so that after running and finding a tree to lay under, he “prayed that he might die.” The verse goes on to say, “I have done enough, Lord…Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”

How heartbreaking. But also, how similar has it been for some of us to get so overwhelmed and drained that even though we are confident in the power of God, we fall into the taunts of the enemy to give up. To leave it all behind. Or if you’re like me, just numb it all out and seclude yourself.

However it is that we handle our moments of feeling overwhelmed, I want you to pay very close attention to how God responds to Elijah.

After being completely honest with God in his despair, Elijah did not wait for a response, instead, he actually just fell asleep. (verse 5)

But thank goodness we serve a God who is not only powerful, but the most gentle provider. Jehovah Jireh means “the God who provides”. Though this characteristic is often used in reference to the story of Abraham, I feel as though it is also so beautifully exhibited in this scene to come…

Hearing His child cry and seek comfort under the shadow of a tree, scripture immediately goes into revealing the caring heart of
God as the verse reads, “all at once an angel touched him and said, ‘get up and eat.'” with bread appearing over hot coals and a jar of water lying beside it. And so, Elijah did. Then shortly after, he fell back asleep. Honestly, I find this so sweet that with such peace and comfort in the presence of the working hand of God, Elijah doesn’t ask questions or try to pay God back. He just accepts the care and food provided and continues resting.

It is so nice to know that when we come to God, our striving can cease. He knows we cannot properly handle this whole life thing on our own, so my dear friend, please stop making yourself carry a weight not meant for your limited capacity.

Moving on to verse 7, it begins with a patience so wholesome. Revealing God’s understanding of us and our drained hearts, He does not make His angel force Elijah to stay awake after eating and drinking. Instead, there is a moment where God gives Elijah time to sleep before the verse stated, “The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, ‘Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.'”

Wow. I pray in your moments of feeling scattered and empty, you may rest in the loving care of God. He does not condemn us for how we feel. Rather, He does everything He knows will bring comfort and true life into our dying hope.

I encourage you to go on reading through chapter 19 as God eventually ends up speaking in a soft, gentle whisper after Elijah feels strengthened. But for this blog, if you take anything, I pray it is openness you pursue towards the things God wishes to fill you with. Not to preach the false health, wealth, and prosperity gospel, but for the sake of remembering who truly has control.

It wasn’t until Elijah began fearing Jezebel’s threat based on his own strength that he felt overwhelmed and in despair. His focus was lost. Whether it be a common struggle we have to rest in the hope of God’s provision or not, I warn you fellow Christian, that the enemy can so easily slip into even the smallest of cracks in our unbelief. But when, not if, you find yourself in this position of fear or despair, do not push aside the only source of strength and love that is capable of restoring your hope.

God understands your flaws and limits. Yet He still desperately pursues a relationship with you. I pray that you, my dear friend, take heart in the gentleness of Jehovah Jireh. For no other can provide your every need in the same perfectly compassionate approach of Him who came off His throne for you to have a path to redemption.

at a loss.

bible, christian, Christian lifestyle, easter, encouragement, lifestyle, prayer, Worship

I don’t really want to write anything right now. Like if I could hide away in my room for the next few years, or maybe decades, I totally would.

I write this blog on Monday, March 27th, 2023. Four days before I put down my best friend. My baby. My beloved 14 year old pekingese, Macho. I didn’t want to write anything because I didn’t want anyone to ask about him or ask how I am doing because it will just make me feel worse. But for some aggravating reason, God keeps weighing this post on my mind. And yes, I say aggravating because I REALLY don’t want to think about it, much less write and post about it. But maybe God wants to speak to someone besides me, or maybe it is just for me to look back on as the encouragement I may desperately need in the coming weeks. I guess we shall see.

One thing a lot of people don’t know about me is that I struggle a lot with being joyful. But recently, when I would think about what I have to do in four days, God has been reminding me that there is ALWAYS good to find. Crazy, I know. Believe me, He knows I think it is absolutely insane to see any glimpse of goodness in this time. But He persisted with this promise every time I would try to negotiate Him giving Macho 20 more years of life in exchange for literally anything I could give up. In all honesty, it was kind of annoying. As I said, I struggle with being joyful quite a bit. Not because I can’t see it, but because after so many disappointments in my life, I tend to not even try to look.

But that’s just it. If Jesus, in all His glory, is standing 1 foot away from me, but I keep my eyes and ears closed in the name of “protecting my heart from another disappointment”, it is not His fault that I cannot see His goodness.

I heard this song by Hannah McClure called “Always good”. I love that song…usually. But when I was thinking about what is about to happen, all the song did was make me mad. How can God ALWAYS be good, or turn things for good, if things like this have to happen? Like why even exhaust myself trying to see this glimpse of glory if it is only a result of the massive storm of pain?

Then my mind reminded my heart of this: John 3:16. Genesis 37. Genesis 6-9. Ruth. Daniel 3. and so on.

In each and every one of those stories, there was a devastating or super scary experience or event that happened just before God revealed exactly where His goodness had been the whole time. And yes, Jesus is included in the list. God Himself, lost His Son. Not by natural death, but by sacrifice because He knew it was the most loving expression anyone could do.

Ironically, Easter is in just a few weeks. But three days before that is a day that should be very dark. It’s the day Jesus died. The day that Heaven went silent, in a mixture of mourning and anticipation for the promise of the coming goodness. We call it Good Friday only because we can testify of the genuine goodness that followed that devastating event.

But what about times like now? Where the only thing in sight is the devastation. The loss. The event that honestly seems impossible to be turned in any other direction besides depressing.

My dear friend, if those are your thoughts, I am right there with you. But I have learned some stuff recently. And although I am slow to wanting to feel gratitude towards anything right now, I have to say, I believe God has prepared me for this moment with snippets of truth He brought me through the blessing of others over the last few months:

Joy is a choice. You can be joyful without feeling happy. It is okay to be sad, God designed us with emotions, but it is not okay to let the sadness be louder than the truth from the voice of the Spirit. The mind can know truth without the heart believing it. In this case, choosing to surrender your heart to God even when it feels pointless is your most important task. And lastly, God is ALWAYS good. His plans are good and beautiful regardless of the mess you feel entangled in.

Again I say, joy, and honestly, experiencing anything pertaining to the character of God, IS. A. CHOICE.

It is a choice that only you can make. And it is a choice that requires discipline over motivation. Wisdom over feelings. And faith over sight.

This is definitely not the first time I have felt this way about life and the goodness of God and honestly, I am pretty sure it is no where near the last time. But that is just it. Life is a cycle of ups and downs, not because God’s goodness changes, but because we fail to choose consistent faith in who He is.

Like a roller coaster about to make it’s big drop, we close our eyes in fear of what lies ahead. We scream in chaos because we are overwhelmed by the experience. But friend, the longer you close your eyes and the louder you scream, the more time you will spend shutting out the potential goodness Jesus want’s to show you and the less you will hear the voice of truth and peace that the Spirit wants to whisper to you.

Dear tender-hearted reader…and future me, I know goodness is the last thing you want someone to tell you to “try to see”. I know numbing emotions, sulking, or distracting yourself may seem a lot more intriguing. But worldly solutions were not meant to heal a heart designed and crafted in Heaven. Only our gracious, and yes, very good, Creator can properly handle that beautiful, yet broken heart in a way that will last.

Be honest in your pain. But do not misplace your desperation when searching for healing. You belong to God. And oh boy, is there so much great freedom in that.

Choose to believe the fruit will one day bloom from your soil that seems to only be getting tilled right now.

So…where do I see the goodness in losing my dog? Well, the truth is, I don’t. But perhaps the glory of this moment will come to life after my own. Perhaps the goodness was meant to be seen in the life he lived. Or perhaps it is in the fact that he no longer has to suffer. Whatever it is, wherever it is, does not change the truth that it is somewhere. So may worship continue according to the truth I know, as God is still always good, even when I can’t see it.

Beautifully Desperate

bible, christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement

“For she said, ‘If I touch even his garments, I will be made well.'” – Mark 5:28

One of the most overlooked feelings, I have come to notice, is desperation. In a world constantly promoting independence and self-sustainability, being desperate is often one of the last ways a person would probably hope to be described as. But in the eyes of a God wanting nothing but the best for their child, no characteristic could be so critical.

There once was a woman with a hurt that seemed to have no end. Day after day, year after year, her illness remained persistent, but so did her humble heart. The moment that the Messiah was rumored to be passing through her town, she did what she had to do to reach Him. Even if it was just for a glimpse.

With the crowd growing and the judgment of those around her, knowing the unclean illness she had, this was no easy journey, but it was one that she believed would result in a life-changing blessing. She was desperate for the presence of God and she refused to allow the people or circumstances around her keep her from experiencing it.

I heard this quote the other day that said what we truly need is “an expectation that is willing to wait in His presence and a desperation that is willing to take action when He says to move.”

Chills. I know. And what a beautiful picture we see of that exact posture as we unpack this ill woman’s story.

With every step came concern and anxiousness, I am sure, as there is always the thought of rejection deep in the mind of those who act in desperation. But this was different. Within moments, a far away glimpse turned into a gentle contact with the One that so many have proclaimed to be the Messiah. What was once known as life was divided into the past and made into a new thing. In an act following her inward desperation for God and all the good things that He is, she was healed and freed from the identity society gave her as the “sick woman”.

Because of Jesus, she walked with a new name. Her steps were light as she allowed Him to take up her burdens. In her great desperation, came a great redemption.

My dear friend, there is a never ending supply of grace and freedom in the hands of Jesus. But until you empty your own hands and choose the humble path of a soul desperate for it’s maker, you will never give yourself the opportunity to experience that awe-striking presence of God.

As NON-self-sufficient as it may sound, a desperate heart after God’s own is a posture that one should pursue as long as they breathe.

Back to the Heart of It All – restoring God’s authority over His blessings in our lives

christian, Christian lifestyle, encouragement, lifestyle

“Return to me, and I will return to you.” – Malachi 3:7

This topic of returning has been pressing on my heart for a while. As I tried to plan out my content for this month’s blogs and future projects, there has been a heavy message weighing on my every decision.

In the midst of trying to bring hope to those God placed around me, I realize I may have gotten lost in the mission rather than the One who sent me.

I came to this thought as I was desperately praying for God’s direction in a completely different area of my life yet was reminded of the “work” I do for Him through this blog and other media content. I am not going to lie. I was a bit frustrated. I simply wanted an answer to my current problem, not growing anxiety over the one thing in my life that in all honesty, I felt pretty confident in.

But that is just it. In this one concern I prioritized, I was living out 1 Thessalonians 5:17 as much as I could, but regarding my “work” for Him, the prayers were far and few between as I got used to developing the content I needed whenever I was scheduled to post something. I no longer saturated this area of my life in prayer like I used to. And before I could be shown an answer to the part of my life that I was so focused on, God reminded me that His priorities come first.

These blogs were not meant to become “work”. They were meant to unify, encourage vulnerability, challenge, and express compassion to those who read it. Yet I strayed into the perspective of “I can write a post really quick, so I will do just that.” My first fruits no longer went to God and what He called me to, but rather, to my own greatest concerns.

In Malachi 3, God speaks of His open arms to the Israelite’s as well as their rejection. He brings up the way in which the people of Israel chose to give their tithes and offerings to their own priorities rather than to Him. And because of this, they strayed from the One they used to so passionately serve “in former years” (3:4). Yet He did not give up on them. Instead, He reminded them of His consistent love and forgiving heart (3:6). And because He remains the same, so do His promises to those who choose to live for Him.

In verse 8, He straight up states the way in which the people of Israel have strayed. Their first fruits were misplaced. Yet He follows it with a path to redemption and a promise of abundant blessings in verse 10. Isn’t it so beautiful to witness the overflowing heart of forgiveness our God has? Not only does He forgive our rebellious pasts, but He gives us a hope for a future we cannot imagine through the glorious plans He has in store (Jeremiah 29:11).

My dear friend, I believe this is exactly what we miss in the rush of life. Between the expectation’s the world lays on us, the goals we set for ourselves, and the responsibilities we have no choice but to carry, we lose sight of where our first fruits must be. And to the busy soul, “that is just life”. But that mindset could not be more detrimental to our faith.

There is a hope unimaginable and a peace incomparable that God provides to those who come back to the heart of what He designed them for. I think it is easy to take something He has blessed us with and build our own vision for it’s future, but may we be challenged to remind ourselves of our authority as stewards.

In verse 7, God says “Return to Me, and I will return to you.” This is a requests followed by an undeserved blessing. But do not mistake God’s “return” as if He left. That which He is returning to you in this promise is the blessing of experiencing Him as a cleansed heart. No longer do we have to be bound by the weight of what we see as important or the goals we hope to achieve, because ultimately, what we have is not meant to be lead by our own vision. Because of our mortal minds, our vision for our lives and the work we do is limited by our human perspective. When God says return to Him, it is not because He just wants control, but because He knows that when we follow the purpose of our design, we flourish the most.

So fellow Christian, may you remind yourself that being a Christian is being a follower of a Christ. And being a follower of Christ is being a steward of the blessings He gives, not the one in control. May you be reminded to come back to the heart of what He called you to be and do. And may no fear, anxiety, pride, or judgement stop you from doing so.

This blog was built on prayer and surrender to the vision of God. So as we move throughout the weeks and more posts are published, I am excited to see where God leads as I restore Him back to Lord of this blog, my vision, and every breathe from now on. I lay down the desire to be trendy for the mission of being transformational again. My dear friend, I hope and pray you continue to follow me on this journey of pursuing Christ together. It may be hard, but it is beyond necessary.

In The Waiting – resting on the faithfulness of God when the future is unclear

christian, encouragement, lifestyle

“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised, is faithful.”

-Hebrews 10:23

What I have come to realize is that you can make your vision board, build new disciplines, and focus all of your attention on the thing you are passionate about. But if it is not in God’s timing for you to be at a specific point in life, no amount of work can push you past His sovereignty.

You may meet people, get jobs, or get great opportunities through your hard work, but you know when it is not the door you have been praying God opens. Sometimes, or maybe if you are like me, a LOT of the time, the goal we seek to reach is often standing at the end of a long marathon of everyone’s favorite thing…waiting.

Believe me, I have been there. And in all honesty, I am still so far from the end of that great marathon I believe God is walking me through. Of course there are many blessings God reveals along the way. But what I speak of now is the period of time between the big dream and the actual experience.

Normally, my way of coping my anxiety and lost hope in these moments is through reminding myself that God is a God of seasons. And if I really feel like He is calling me to something, I believe eventually the flowers will bloom again. But lately, this strategy has been having a hard time giving me lasting peace. And thankfully, God seemed to have noticed because just the other day, He smacked me with a mountain of truth that left me in complete awe.

“I will believe I can know peace without knowing what comes next.” – Morgan Harper Nichols.

Maybe this quote doesn’t quite knock your socks off. But after enduring what has felt like forever of door after door shutting in my face, leaving me with nothing but confusion and growing insecurities, this hit deep. And just before I heard this quote, this one topic kept coming up around me: We cannot afford to live without being in awestruck wonder of God. Every. Single. Day.

But in order to capture the depth of that thought, we must first understand the verse above. This one verse speaks in three different tenses.

“Let us hold fast…” is in present tense. It is an instruction for what to do right now with the hope that God gives. “He who promised” is in future tense. Pointing to the statements of power and experience that have yet to be revealed in fullness. It is also offering the place where you find the hope it previously directs you to “hold fast” to. Lastly, “is faithful” is in past tense. This tells how the glory of God has already been expressed and has been proven credible.

But what truly drove me to this verse was the order in which it was written. It provided wisdom for the present and a peace for the future by reminding you of the past.

As the creator of time, God knows how it effects us. He knows that it grows us, but also limits us. With time being so powerful over our mortality, isn’t it such a blessing that God reveals Himself to be even more powerful over time? I would argue that although the present and future take up a large part of our concerns, it is often the past that drives our anxiety because we do not want the bad moments to find their way into impacting our limited future. Maybe you use the past as a growth opportunity or maybe you cannot seem to get over it. Regardless, its authority in our lives is undoubtedly influential.

What is truly beautiful is how God reveals Himself to be present in all 3 tenses, but it is the past that He uses to build our peace. The past is the only tense that will remain consistent. Nothing you do now or in the future will effect what has already happened.

Sound familiar? I am immediately reminded of the picture of God’s love. Because of what Jesus has done on the cross in the past, my present and future are covered in His grace because regardless of the changing seasons, His love was portrayed on Calvary and nothing I do can change what has already happened.

This my dear friend, is why reflecting on how you are left in awestruck wonder of God every single day is so critical to how you handle your future. As you force your eyes to seek God’s glory, regardless of your uncertain future and confusing present, you will still have a peace to abide in.

I don’t know if you caught it, but the quote from Nichols above is actually a statement in which she is aiming to discipline herself to, not a statement of how she naturally is. If you want to be at peace even when the next step in life is as foggy as can be, you need to steward your thoughts towards that which reminds you of the glory of God.

Waiting is hard. I am not going to pretend like it will be an exciting experience even after you build a God-glorifying mindset. But there will be a difference when you begin prioritizing a perspective reflecting God’s own. That invisible yet monumental feeling of being content in your present and hopeful in your future is captured in 5 little letters; peace. The peace of God is what allows us to focus on every moment and it’s great potential as anxiety bows and striving ceases.

I am sorry if you have been waiting for something for a long time. I really am, but acknowledging the burden of waiting on our own strength is the first step towards a peaceful freedom. So do not lose hope my friend because the faithfulness of the One you find your peace in has never and will never change. It is not temporary happiness nor numbing despair that will make your waiting season reveal it’s great purpose. I pray that the comfort of Christ meets you where you are in that long, long marathon so that the journey towards the finish line may become a part of the faithfulness you can look back on in the future.

Rest in His peace because He who promised is faithful indeed!