encouragement

Ever Dependent – A Short Word on Relying on God

bible, christian, encouragement

Leviticus 13

It’s a terrible feeling to be clueless. I don’t have a problem admitting I don’t know something, as long as the knowledge is attainable in a somewhat immediate way. But recently there has been a pile of moments growing where I feel helpless. Or plainly put, dumb.

This morning was one of those moments, but as I write this evening, I am grateful for what God is revealing.

I read Leviticus 13 today…

If you know what that’s about, it’s not the most exciting portion of scripture. And this morning, I struggled when I finished. I normally make a final quick prayer of gratitude for God’s Word made available to me and for whatever it was that He taught me. But today, I couldn’t think of a single thing I learned besides to beware of “defiling skin diseases”(v. 2).

I gave thanks, but then I sat there for a minute. A while back, I vowed to get through the whole Bible without commentaries since it’s my first time and because of my past problem with idolizing knowledge over the Word and presence of God Himself. So that was not the option I wanted to resort to. But then, in just a moment, I said something along the lines of, “Holy Spirit, please open my eyes, because I don’t know what you’re trying to say through that. But I believe all your Word is relevant and used for teaching us.”

Honestly, it shocked me that I thought of that. Perhaps that was your first thought to my dilemma, but it surely wasn’t mine. So as the day progressed, and I reflected on a few topics God has placed on my mind lately regarding our dedication to Him, I realized how much I needed that prayer this morning.

This culture is so very individualistic. Now, as an introvert, I don’t mind doing everything myself (my pride thinks I’ll do it better alone anyways). But that is not how we ought to be. That is not how God created us.

We are made for community. And I don’t just mean with other humans, but deep community with God as well.

Spending time with Him is my favorite thing each morning. Somehow, I have managed to do it without coffee now, and I still find it to be my favorite time. But when I skip days, as I unfortunately did the recent weekend, I feel the heaviness of dependency. I feel the weight of not giving my first fruits to God.

I immediately felt great anxiety and hopelessness again and the terrible feeling of being rushed for no reason. Let me be clear, I still struggle with all of those feelings on a weekly basis, but normally the feeling of God’s presences overcomes it all, giving me hope and truth to speak over it. God is still good if the healing isn’t total, for one day it will be.

But today it was different. I felt better, but still confused on His teaching and a few other things I’ve been thinking about. Yet I was at peace. Not because I discovered what was so significant about the skin diseased people in Leviticus 13, but because I realized I was dependent again on God. Not completely, but surely it is my priority again.

I have set boundaries with myself to seek His unexplainable joy and patience at my job, His truth and hope over my mental battles, and His strength and faith in my uncertainties.

My dear friend, dependency on Jesus means so much more than trusting Him in big trials that you can’t control anyways. It is more than giving up your Sunday mornings for church. And it is even more than devoting the first portion of your day to Him. It is all those and then some. We must not let the individualism or complacency of this culture to let us believe we can live a single breath without God. That “self-sufficient” life is not what we were made for and it is only by Him alone we can be made new and better.

So when you consider who He is, as our worthy Lord, and who we are, a helpless sinner, may we grow hungry after a dependent life on Him. For who else defeated our destined condemnation and freed us from chains we sold ourselves to? No one, but Jesus. May He be your everything in every area of your life.

January Musings – The God of His Word

bible, christian, encouragement

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7

I had a pitiful moment the other day. Just after I had done what some may consider an awesome thing, the same feeling of hopelessness flooded my mind that typically does after I teach others about God.

I cannot tell you what exactly sparks this feeling, but I can assure you that it always comes shortly after God has done something incredible in my life. It is a feeling of “this is far too good to be true”.

And I don’t mean in terms of what I am doing by my own power, but solely in regards to what God has done. Sometimes, if I am honest, it feels as though I have received something He intended for another. Perhaps someone who appreciates all things and can agree that “God is good” to them without a shadow of a doubt.

Unfortunately, as I much as I wish and aspire to be that person, I have yet to get there.

So, after I had taught a group of people about Jesus, I could not handle my thoughts. It was as though a flood of anxiety rushed over my whole body. Paralyzing my every attempt at distracting myself with mindless actions.

As I laid on my bed after work that day, I tried to force my body to get up and do something, anything, to stop the thinking. They were the kind of thoughts that I cannot even communicate into words. All I can describe it as was the very presence of anxiety. The same way I would describe experiencing God as the very presence of peace and hope. This was anything but that.

I raced through ideas of what I could possibly do to force myself – my whole being – to get out of this slump, and suddenly, like a small candle in a pitch black room, one thought containing some hope came to mind. That was to force myself into a posture of surrendering to God.

1 Peter 5:7 was spoken like a whisper breaking painful silence in my heart. So, I ran with it.

I grabbed a book about living for Jesus, put worship music in my air pods, got on my bike and ran out the door.

It was only about 2 songs in until I ran out of energy, as I am not the most fit person in the world, so I parked my bike at a random bench a few blocks from my house and sat down, staring at the grass. It was like the old days. The days in college, where blogs like “Finding Your Quiet Place” was written. It was a place of peace.

And I do not just mean the grassy patch I found, though that was nice. But more so, the space made clear in my heart. I ached for God. As much as I wanted to curl up in a ball and let my anxieties bring me to the place of hopelessness, that I know far too well, something in me knew that wasn’t the place I was in anymore, and it wasn’t a place I would give God room in.

After a couple minutes, I pulled out the book, “Practicing the Way”, (..that I definitely have not been “reading” for like the last year..) and I focused all I could on every word. John Mark Comer is a believer I greatly admire, and though I was intrigued by his writing, it had me pause a lot and realize the way God was moving. Not just in the past, but right now. In this place, on that bench, at that moment.

The suffocating feeling my soul felt from this inexplicable anxiety was slowly being relieved. Not completely gone, but definitely on its way.

I sat there some more, just looking around and realized the problem with our society. Well, if I am being real, the problem with me. Our culture is so loud. And as much as I have been disciplining my actions to stay a safe distance away from this world of distraction, I have hardly focused on my thoughts consistently. Only every so often would I consider the weight of my thoughts in regards to the distraction I experience from God.

There is more to a disciplined life seeking the quiet if your goal is to hear the whisper and experience the nearness of the Lord. It is more than setting restrictions on your social media, setting aside quiet time alone, or making boundaries with those around you. It is about the stillness you allow God to move through in your mind and heart as well. It is about the casting of your worries, your cares, your dreams, your hopes…dear believer, it is the casting of all things that run across your mind. The casting of them to God.

1 Peter 5:7-9 says this:

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.”

I am only going to pull out verse 7 but I thought the surrounding words may be a blessing to read for some.

Verse 7 says that we ought to cast ALL our anxiety on Him. Not because we will die or be smote by Him if we don’t, but simply because He cares for you. And part of the humility spoken in verse 6 is understanding He is more powerful than your anxieties combined. And only when they are placed in His hands, will they be used to bring Him glory and us good.

This verse is intriguing to see in that context because this passage was written for the elders of the Church and their flock. Many would assume that the Christian walk brings you on a smoother path than others, but that is not true, and this verse reveals that. To the people pursuing God, they are told that rather than a smooth journey through life, they will receive the companionship of God Himself in every step of the way. As they walk through this chaotic life of many trials, He is close and He is caring. Hoping we see the beauty and blessing of casting all to Him.

I said I was only focusing on verse 7, but I feel that the one following it is relevant to this point.

In verse 8, it calls believers to be sober minded. This means something along the lines of being free from intoxicating influences. Though that could mean material things, I would argue the could cover internal toxic things as well, such as our thoughts.

Now I am no master at controlling my thoughts. I have grown from where I was, but still there remains a struggle. One of the most common toxic thoughts in my mind is that which I stated at the beginning, “this is far too good to be true”.

When I was growing up, I heard of how powerful and great God was. I heard that we were but sinners unable to do anything truly good without Him. So as I went through life and experienced things, there were moments I felt very uncomfortable. Those were moments of good things. At every award or opportunity received, I would feel good for a second and then hear this voice that weighed me down like a ball and chain…

…”You don’t deserve this. Someone better should be in your shoes. You are a sinner and only deserve Hell”.

This thought became my mindset towards every good thing I was a part of. But what I now know, is that is only half the truth.

Yes. We are all sinners. Technically, we all deserved Hell. That is true. But what is also true is that Jesus Christ paid the price of our sin, so we could run free with Him for eternity.

I had heard what Jesus did for me since I was in 5th grade. But it took believing God is a God of His Word for me to stop the toxic thoughts that the half truth stirred up in my mind. For until I did, my mind was fogged by lies born out of the only truth I believed – that I was a sinner and deserved nothing but Hell.

My dear friend, allowing those lies to grow does not equal a sober mind. For it just leads to the decaying of the hope in your heart and soul. It leads to a life where you think you can control what you cannot and a place of unnecessary hopelessness. Believing in the whole truth, God’s Word, that His sacrifice was enough, does not mean you now deserve goodness. It simply opens your heart up to accepting His grace and living by His will. It makes your whole being available to whatever He calls you to. Not because you deserve, are good enough, or worthy of anything. But simply because He is the God who cares. So take Him at His Word.

Thoughts to Consider:

How would you describe the state of your mind/thoughts/anxieties?

What are the things, in any of area of your life, that you need to cast to God? (Not meaning disregarding things, but giving control of them to God).

List the lies you have been believing, even if they are half-truths, and find scripture that combats them.

Consider the transformation you can have for God if you began believing He was a God of His Word.

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7

What He’s Done – Reflections on Daniel 3

Christian lifestyle, encouragement, spiritual formation

“But if not, He is still good.” – commonly associated with the passage of Daniel 3.

Last week, I found a picture on Pinterest with the quote above. I am going to be honest, I could not recall what it was referencing, but I had gone through Daniel before and I thought it was a uniquely short, but intriguing phrase. So without much thought, I made it my phone’s lock screen.

Little did I know, it played a large role in my perspective this past week. I am unsure as to why, but the last 6 days or so have been the kind where you reconsider everything you’re doing in life and contemplate if everything needs to change or if you’re just overthinking. Day after day, I not only was caught up in all my thoughts, but I happen to endure the most annoying and frustrating little experiences that seemed to pop up every few hours. To name a few; I slammed my finger in a door, I spilled coffee all over the inside my work bag, I hit a massive pothole, I wasted money on an insulated travel mug that doesn’t even hold heat beyond an hour, and for the cherry on top, I have been judged by all my students for the last 3 days because my eye has been insanely swollen.

Alone, these inconveniences don’t seem too bad. But as they happened so consistently, I am not going to lie, I was tempted to question why in the world God thought it was so funny to let them keep happening. But what is weird, is that I didn’t truly get mad. I am not known to be the most positive person anymore in life, and especially not when I face inconveniences. But any time I tried to cultivate some bitterness, it was uprooted and replaced with hope that good could still come out of the day. Part of me feels that may have been a result of the conviction I felt every time I looked at my new lock screen. Though that was not the only word God pressed on my heart this week.

A long time ago, I heard a song that said, “Who am I to deny what the Lord has done?” Now, I have listened to that song a million or so times since I first heard it, but for some reason, that line has been repeating in my head along with the flashbacks of the actual moment I heard that for the first time and broke into tears. Initially, I thought it was just going to go away without any purpose, but then it all hit me as I was standing outside my classroom with 22 kids asking how I could have forgotten the keys inside when we left for Chapel. Amidst their pleading for a tardy pass for their next class, I heard one kid look at me and say, “Ms. Dan, this is really just not your day, is it?”

Though I felt a sense of guilt for the mishap these kids had to experience because of my mindless action, I actually just busted out laughing. It was as though time froze when he said that to me and I realized what the point of the repetitive song stuck in my head was for and why I was so attracted to this random new lock screen.

When I got home that afternoon, I ran straight to my prayer notebook and re-read the last week’s-worth of entries. Just as I thought, page after page was dedicated to the complaints I had, while short sentences finished the entry in praise…

Let’s take a quick dive into Daniel 3 for a moment to give a background on the highlighted verse.

Leading up to the verse that inspired the quote at the top of this blog (v.18), Daniel was facing quite a pickle.

This king named Nebuchadnezzar (great inspiration for a baby boy name if you are looking for something Biblical haha), had a dream that made him highly concerned. He sought many wise men before he finally found Daniel to interpret it for him. Though Daniel did the job by the wisdom of God, the peace only lasted for so long after that. Nebuchadnezzar’s pride got the best of him and he decided to make this massive image of gold and command everyone to bow down and worship it whenever they sounded a signal. For many, this was no issue, but for Daniel’s companions; Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, this was not worth dishonoring God over.

When Nebuchadnezzar heard of their disobedience, he sent soldiers to take captive Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego so that he could throw them in a furnace. Now this wasn’t just a big ole bonfire they happen to gather together, this furnace was so hot that the soldiers who pushed the 3 men into it, were burned to death as they got closer.

Though just before they were lead into it, Nebuchadnezzar gave them a final chance to change their minds as he mocked their God. Rather than caving into the fear or responding with anger, they said, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and He will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if He does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.” (v. 16-18).

How inspiring is that bold mindset amidst such adversity? The more I looked into this passage, the more my thoughts began falling into place.

When I saw the lack of gratitude in my prayer notebook, I began to realize that perhaps that phrase, “but if not, He is still good.” and the song verse, “Who am I to deny what the Lord has done?” were divinely placed on my heart this specific week.

The flashbacks I kept having of the first time I heard that song was during a time where I truly felt little to no joy or hope and the thought of going to God as broken and distant as I felt, made my heart physically ache. Out of pure routine and half an ounce of wishful thinking, I went to a church service that had some special speaker for young adults. Though the message also hit my soul, what made me ball my eyes out like a baby in front of a bunch of strangers was that song verse. Why? Because for the first time in a year, I realized how persistent God was extending His love and how often I rejected it. Unlike those 3 men in Daniel 3, I saw the tough situation I was in and dismissed the capabilities of the God I serve.

Now, I have grown a lot since that time. But if I am honest, a large part of me still finds so much comfort in sorrow. Whether I have a reason to be sad or not, I feel secure in it. Though what I failed to notice for such a long time, was that me gravitating towards that feeling was simultaneously turning my eyes away from my reality – the reality that God is who He says He is and I have indeed been saved by Him.

God pulled me out of the pit I was in. Surely, I still suffer from some ways of thinking, but that does not negate all the goodness the Lord has done. How foolish is it to plead for deliverance, receive it, yet live the rest of your life trying to re-shackle the broken chains on yourself?

I am not advocating lying to yourself to “find joy”, but I am saying that if you desire freedom from a life-stripping cycle of behavior, you must, in every way possible, bring yourself to see the reality of God’s involvement in your life.

My dear friend, you must seek out what He has done. For as you do, the inconveniences and burdens of this world will grow strangely dim in comparison to the goodness of God and the depth of His love for you. It is then in those moments of frustration as our circumstances go south, that we too can end our prayers with, “but if not, You are still good. For who am I to deny what You have done?” and actually mean it from the core of our heart.

Thoughts to consider:

Do you find yourself magnifying the burdens of your day over the blessings?

How can you begin implementing the discipline of gratitude in your daily schedule?

Do you focus on living out the purpose you have to love God and others no matter what or do you idolize your comfort through trying to control all circumstances in your life?

Consider the way your heart can transform by aligning your perspective with the Lord’s and how that can influence others to do the same.

“But if not, He is still good.” – “Who am I to deny what the Lord has done?”

August Musings – God’s Timeless Truth

bible, christian, encouragement

This is a special time of the year. August is the month I launched this blog three years ago. August 26th, 2021 to be exact.

I had been thinking of what to write for a while now. But it seems as though writers block has had a hold on me for weeks. There are currently 3 drafts that are half-written with the same title, “August Musings”, on my computer at the moment. I know, I suppose they hadn’t truly been my “musings” this month if I can’t finish a single one of them. Nonetheless, there is one common topic that I found myself mentioning…

Reminiscing.

To reminisce is to “indulge in enjoyable recollection of past events”. What I felt was not regret, but I have definitely been spending a lot of present time wishing I could relive the past. The reason being, to be completely honest, is because I feel like I was a better writer when I began this blog than the one I am now.

As I reread old posts and remember the ease I had in typing up a 1500 word piece that included Bible breakdowns, humor, and contemplative thoughts, I have been dreading posting anything lately. Especially considering the milestone of three years is a day away. I couldn’t help but feel like nothing was good enough anymore.

I sat with this burden for weeks. But how funny is God to place a word of peace on my heart the night before this anniversary.

In January, I wrote a post called “January Musings“. It was about a word of hope that I will never forget. It was truly one of the most freeing moments in my life and I am so thankful for the transformation it has brought. But as I reread it a few nights ago, I thought about the struggle I have been facing and the way I kept wishing I could go back in time and write like the old days. To be frank, I thought my heart would be justified in it’s sorrow because I thought that blog would make me recognize how far I have come in my writing skills…in a bad a way. But as I look back, thank the Lord that is not what happened.

Was I reassured of my talent? Not really. But I was enlightened!

What I saw in that blog was not skill, but a word of hope from God that had no expiration. It was a word that brought life back into my heart in the beginning of this year and was still capable of doing the same now. In this moment. This place. This agonizing stage of my writing career.

“From death to life” was the phrase I received. As someone who finds much comfort in melancholic environments and moods, this was tough to hear. Because whether or not I wanted to change, I knew that life – that which brings glory to God and love to those around me – was only possible if I stopped making my bed in the grave. It meant I needed to live out the word of a “new thing” I had felt God press on my heart.

When I say “new thing”, I do not mean a shiny, successful, easy new season I just chose waltz into. I meant a new perspective. A new outlook on what was worth dedicating my life to. No longer could I justify the days I ignored the world for my own “peace” of mind or the weeks I chose to bury myself in the habits that only cultivated despair.

Now I am not going to lie, it has been tough. Truly one of the hardest things is denying every urge in your body and mind from resorting back to the place you thought brought comfort, because more than the comfort, it brought death. Literally? Surely it could have been a possibility in the long run, but I am more so speaking about spiritual death. I knew the truth though, and when I didn’t feel like what I knew was enough, I forced myself to search deeper. And praise God, for every time I looked, I found His heart to be even greater than I could originally fathom.

But amidst the spiritual growth I had since January, was the discouragement I faced in my writing. I took a hiatus from social media at the end of 2023 and did not return until just about two months ago. I thought it would be good for this blog and my other writing projects. And it was, to an extent. But I could not help but feel like I should have done more in my time away. Since my return to social media, I have felt off. I felt like everyone expected greater things and more resources and writings offered. But instead, this blog became bi-weekly rather than the weekly one it had been a year ago. That means half as much content as before.

But as I read the post from January, I realized a beautiful thing about God.

I realized His timing is perfect.

I know I have heard that before, and honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if I wrote about it before. But I want to point out that I am not just talking about the things He brings into action. The doors He opens. The people He introduces us to. Or the miracles He does before us.

What I noticed about His timing was that He knows exactly what we need to endure and for how long we ought to live in that place before we hear a new word. He knows why the words we hear come at the “last moment” and the freedom we experience happens after a specific amount of days, weeks, or even years. His timing in our blessings is surely perfect, but so are the moments He chooses to speak a simple word to us.

This blog originally began with the intention to share “whatever God shared with me this week”. You’d think I would run out of topics, well so did I. But miraculously, God brought specific words to me at specific times. Sometimes it was at the start of the week, where I had time to chew on it for 6 days before blogging. While other times, I recall hectically scrambling to type up a post in the short hour and a half break I had between class and work because that was the moment I heard God give me a new thing.

So as I reminisce, admiring my old work, and deep down wishing I hadn’t lost that talent – I find a sense of peace. Not in the promise that I will ever write like that again, but that perhaps, the words, though received farther apart than they had been three years ago, are still life-giving. Though they seem harder to organize, they are undoubtedly glorifying the Lord. And after all, what more was this blog to be than a vessel of whatever word God desired to share in whatever way He saw best?

My dear friend, life will have it’s moments of doubt. There will be times when everything you thought was supposed to be happening, just isn’t. But that does not mean God’s faithfulness, hope, and purpose He revealed in scripture and in your past is expired. It just means that the words you have received so far are sufficient for the time you are in now. Continue hoping. And when it seems like it is not enough, continue seeking. For God promises that all who seek Him with their whole heart, will indeed find Him. If there is a chance to move your bed from the depths of the grave to the peace of His presence, why would you continue looking for any form of living among the dead?

“Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and He will deliver us again. On Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us.” – 2 Corinthians 1:9-10

For God & For Them

Christian lifestyle, encouragement, spiritual formation

“Sometimes the best we can do is make the choice to act as if this life is a gift. That honors God. And if we make a practice of it, a practice of defying our anxiety and depression by getting out of bed and just giving a few moments of silent prayer of thanks for this life that maybe we still loathe – that pleases God. It gives hope to people you don’t even know. In time you’ll start to feel it, too, and if you don’t at least you did what was right.” – Alan Noble

The hard truth about seeking real healing is that sometimes, it requires breaking the bone again so that it can recover straight this time.

Last week I finished reading a book on managing your feelings. It paid respects to the reality of being a human without disregarding the responsibilities of a follower of Jesus. It was very intriguing, but if I am honest, there were parts of it that reminded me of the thoughts I used to have during times of great despair. I thought that would just reinforce the hopeful mindset I have been disciplining myself to recently, but I found it more common that my response was an aching for that old, comfortable place – a place where nothing could get worse, for I was already at the bottom of the pit.

As I was reading it, I battled with the desire to resort to my old ways whenever things went wrong; numbing, expecting disappointment, doing the bare minimum to accomplish daily tasks, and pushing away my time with God. It hadn’t hit me until many days passed when I realized others could notice a change. And as much as I wish I could say that challenged me to get out of the slump, it didn’t. It actually just made me more hopeless as I began to consider the healing that has been happening over the last couple of months was perhaps just a season of wishful thinking.

Even as I write this, every bone in my body and thought in my head has been trying to pull me back into the comfort of lying in bed and hiding from the weight of relaying God’s word to you on this blog.

Though the Holy Spirit is a sweet being…for all but One voice in me argues for resting in despair.

Recently I have been reading 1 Corinthians. Great insight can be found throughout every chapter, but one that has planted itself in my mind was the message of God’s desire for unity. You constantly see Paul express the importance of loving others, respecting others struggles with temptation, and the need for building peace among one another.

Now, I am no where near the most social person in the world, but I realize this isn’t about going out and telling every person you pass that, “JESUS LOVES YOU”. Surely that is a way to share God’s love, but let’s be real, I will never be that outgoing of an individual. Nor is that what scripture is telling us we must do. No, rather, what we see is Paul describe that every action, from our words, to our thoughts, to the way we dress and eat have the ability to glorify God and love on others. The overall message isn’t to be the loudest voice shouting “Jesus saves”, but the most disciplined and loving. And through our every action that is honorable to God, we make room for the heart of Christ to be reflected and open a door for the Holy Spirit to move in those around us.

I read a book called “On Getting Out of Bed” a while back. It is the one quoted at the top of this blog. The title may sound silly if you never endured a time of depression, but it was truly one of main sources of inspiration I found that led me to believe that the way things were, were not how they had to be.

It honestly threw me for a loop, because I started reading it expecting some great advice I could do for myself that would be inspiring enough to power me through the rest of my days, but such was not the complete case. Surely, there were great points on things pertaining ourselves, but it began with a reference from a book called “The Road”, a story of selfless love between a father and son. Through some incredible hardships, the father tells the son that the bravest thing he’s done was to get up this morning. Getting up – despite the risk of more trials, shame, fear, pain – even though he didn’t want to for himself…he did it for his son.

Using that story as a foundation for the perspective we should pursue, the book (“On Getting Out of Bed“) consistently pointed back to two main reasons we ought to not make our bed in the “comfortable” place of despair. First, was that the life we live was one God purposely created for His glory. Meaning, regardless of our feelings, for God, we have a duty of living honorably and in gratitude. And secondly, as a being that belongs to God, we have a duty of loving His creation; the people around us.

My dear friend, surely time will create a scar over our wounds and restore a connection between our broken bones. But that does not always mean it is healed in the way it should be. And when that happens, the only way to start really restoring what was broken is to dig back in the wound and clean out everything that was simply a mask for the pain. I was once told that realizing you are further back than you thought you were can be one of the most freeing things. I argued with that for a long time, but I believe now there is so much truth in that statement.

How much longer will you walk with a lame heart believing it is fine just because it’s not missing? It is surely frustrating and painful to face the reality of one’s brokenness, but it is the only place real growth can start from. You may argue that “it is okay”. You may believe your greatest place of safety is despair. But thank heavens, our life isn’t all about us. For those like myself would be stuck in a pit forever. It is not about what is comfortable, but what is right, honorable, and just. That kind of life, my friend, only can be lived when you seek the right thing, no matter the pain it may entail, because it is our duty; for honoring God and for loving them.

Thoughts to consider:

Is there any area of your life that you have allowed healing to happen through time and false remedies instead of through God?

Do you often consider the influence every one of your actions can have on those around you?

Would someone who never spoke to you directly be able to see the love of Christ through you – even during your greatest trials?

Consider the purpose God has for you in every season, and how much you could honor Him and love His people if you prioritized them over your feelings.

“Sometimes the best we can do is make the choice to act as if this life is a gift. That honors God. And if we make a practice of it, a practice of defying our anxiety and depression by getting out of bed and just giving a few moments of silent prayer of thanks for this life that maybe we still loathe – that pleases God. It gives hope to people you don’t even know. In time you’ll start to feel it, too, and if you don’t at least you did what was right.” – Alan Noble