Christian lifestyle

October Musings: The Quiet Selfless Life

bible, Christian lifestyle, spiritual formation

“and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you…” – 1 Thessalonians 4:11

No one has to twist my arm for me to spend time by myself. For some reason, I find some of the most fun times are when I am alone. This is not to degrade the times that I am with others – I love those moments too, but being alone is not just a liking of mine, it is often what I find myself longing for, and desperately needing after a given number of hours in the day.

A couple years ago, I learned about solitude. The kind that you dedicate to God. This honestly blew my mind because I used to feel as though there was something wrong with me for desiring alone time as much as I did. Learning about this helped me understand that there was nothing wrong with liking that time, but there was a way to glorify God during it…and a way to not. And unfortunately, I recognized how often I had spent doing the latter.

Over time, I discipline myself to being intentional about solitude with God, but it has been hard. Considering what I want to do for a living, (being a faith-based author) I struggle a lot because I prefer to stay hidden while people read my heart’s expressions through words in black and white. However, in this day and age, I am forced to utilize things like social media for the sake of actually having my thoughts cross paths with the rest of the world. As much as I have tried to balance the means to my goals and still glorify God in my quiet time, I find myself more so spending the minutes or hours decompressing alone with my mind focused on how I will recharge myself.

The thought of God and fades as my capacity reaches its maximum and that hope of any “God time” turns into “me time”. I have grown a selfish perspective of something God designed for good.

I spend hours searching for ways to become what I feel called to be, yet barely addressing the One who called me. More time alone was what I thought I needed, but I couldn’t have been more wrong.

The quiet life is not about being alone. It is not about doing all you do in silence. Nor is it truly about you at all…

Looking at 1 Thessalonians 4, we find our purpose. “…we instructed you how to live in order to please God…Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more.” (portions of verse 1).

This verse is incredible because it reveals the absence of limits on our growth. You can read the Bible 15 times over, pray every day, and serve weekly, but there will always be more ways to please God. Now let me be clear, this pursuit is not to result in salvation, but to be a result of it. Looking at verse 3, we find out what this process is called; “sanctification”.

In layman’s terms, this means to become more like God. It is the journey all begin once they have committed to a life of dying to themselves and living for Jesus.

This is the general word people use in reference to the overall transformation of their lives for Christ, but I want to focus in on how we ought to pursue a quiet life through this process.

You may be extremely outgoing and thinking this word isn’t for you too but your personality does not change the fact that we ALL are called to live in a way that pleases the Lord, and one thing that Jesus showed us by example throughout the Gospels was that solitude matters and plays a role in shaping the rest of your life.

So, how then does one live a quiet life – without either being selfish and turning it all into “me time” or giving up their extroverted ways?

Simply put, by remembering the purpose. Your purpose.

I’ll say it again, the quiet life is not exactly about spending a certain number of hours alone. It is about what verse 11 highlights; “You should mind your own business and work with your hands…”

Living honest, honorable, and Christ-centered lives each and every day.

Maybe for the extrovert, this looks like spending time in prayer and meditation before you leave your home to protect your heart from the desire of attention or hope in finding value through others. And perhaps for the introvert, this looks like asking God to protect your heart from the selfish desires of comfort over sharing His love with others or from an egocentric way of determining what is worth your time away from home.

I say those from experience in feelings, not from criticism.

Ultimately, the quiet life is more about pursuing God in humility. It is not about volume, as God uniquely and purposely made us all different. Rather, it is to live your days proclaiming one name and loving those whom He saw worth dying for, “that none may perish.” (John 3:16)

My dear friend. I am a lover of quiet, but my flesh turns it into something that glorifies myself. I pray you recognize the value of your hidden place and time with God. For until you do, your heart will always seek to benefit itself first and foremost.

We live for the pleasure of God, not ourselves. That is what quiet looks like.

And we choose to love and stretch ourselves for the sake of those around us, not for an ego boost, more social media likes, or because it’s comfortable, but that they might see Him in us.

Thoughts to Consider:

Do you find yourself using your “God time” for your own boost in pride or most of your alone time for your fleshly indulgences?

Where can you schedule extra time out of your day to focus on your purpose and why God has placed you in the current position you are in?

What distractions or habits do you need to address in order to stay consistent in your quiet time?

Consider how much these intentional moments alone with God could reset not just your approach to your day, but to your whole life as well.

“and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you…” – 1 Thessalonians 4:11

September Musings: Heart-Centered Spiritual Disciplines

bible, Christian lifestyle, spiritual formation

The other night, I stumbled across this individual explaining their regret in waiting for marriage. It wasn’t that they did, rather, it was that they didn’t apply the waiting to anything beyond the physical obedience to God.

Over the last couple years, I have experienced times of great discipline and times of total inconsistency. Unfortunately, I just recently seem to have reached the end of this season of good discipline.

Perhaps traveling so much had a role to play, but that does not change the fact that each and every day comes to a point where I have a certain amount of time to do whatever I please. And embarrassingly, I admit, I have not always offered it to God first. Instead, as my heart could feel the conviction most nights, I would sit and pray out loud, frustrated that I couldn’t push myself to write it down or open up my devotional I spent an unruly amount of money on just a few weeks ago. And on the days that I could match my pen to my prayer journal paper, I would begin with an apology for not physically writing my prayers down for days on end.

This continued for a while. The more days I missed between the entries, the more I would beat myself up and tell myself how such a lack of inconsistency ought to reveal my inability to stay dedicated and close to God. But thank heavens I see now, that is not the right mindset.

It is not about checking off the list. I am sure you have heard that before. But now more than previously, I am noticing that it is about checking your heart and not letting the means to an end become an idol.

I am a lover of routines. If you give me a to-do list or a schedule, I will gladly follow it in order. Perhaps my obsession with an aesthetically pleasing life has an influence on my itching desire to keep everything in line. Now, I am not saying it is bad to be that way, but I am recognizing it may lead to some problems.

In February of this year, I made the decision to start writing down my prayers. I did this for multiple reasons, but one of them was for accountability. I know the kind of discipline I hold myself to when I give my word to others, so I figured if I put my prayers on paper to God, perhaps I would hold it to be as valuable as if I were to have promised a friend that I would contact them every morning. If you know me, you know my word means a lot.

And so for a while, this worked. Again, I had other reasons behind it, which is also what helped me stay dedicated to it, but nonetheless, months had passed and I just reached the start of my third journal book.

Yet after just one entry in the new notebook, two days had passed before the second, then five more before the third, until it started becoming a every-other day journal. Honestly, this aggravated me so much. But, as you read in the beginning of this blog, I struggled to bring my pen to paper. Speaking my prayers felt just as valuable…until I would catch a glimpse of the date of the most recent entry and realize I had not kept my word.

Before I could tear myself completely apart, the Lord was gracious and gave me that great word from the random video on Instagram.

No, my situation is not the same as the couple posting about their story of waiting in purity, but it was similar in the fact that my waiting, my discipline, and my focus, had been more on the check list than the spiritual reason behind the means to my goal.

I wanted to get closer to God. I wanted to be more vulnerable, more open to His Spirit’s guidance. I wanted to learn how to surrender every thing every day to God, despite the inconvenience of waking up an hour early to do so. But my mind got so caught up in the means to the end rather than the end itself. Not saying there is a limit to our growth, but there are such things as spiritual milestones that I believe are worth celebrating when reached. In fact, side note: if your goal is to simply “grow closer to God”, I would argue that you ought to clarify what that looks like in multiple ways. Otherwise, you are setting yourself up to a life of idolizing the journey over the One it’s supposed to lead you to.

I digress. The point I am getting at is that regardless of what discipline you may be holding yourself to, and I am speaking to myself here as well, the check list should go beyond the physical act of obedience. It should be checking the heart too.

There was a time that I forced myself to learn a verse in full. (You are probably thinking…”Aliyah, you don’t have verses memorized?”…No. Not really. Good memory was not one of my gifts I received from the Lord. I am a big paraphraser. One of my most common statements is, “Somewhere in the Bible it says something like…“)

So I decided to challenge myself to learn Psalm 139:23-24.

I left a Bible open on my dresser with that verse underlined for nearly two months. I read it close to daily and would begin my prayers by repeating it twice. After a while of not being able to remember it, I got frustrated and wanted to stop. But I felt guilty every time I saw my Bible open. So I continued.

Surely enough, after weeks on end, I was able to recite it by memory. This was huge. But what was more fascinating, was the way God spoke to me through that verse in a different way time after time. As I would leave a pause between each line, I learned that it wasn’t about repeating it the fastest I could, rather, it was about meditating on it and allowing God to actually use His Word to speak to me.

Yes, it took me months to get to that point with that one set of verses, but I do not believe it made me “fall behind”. For who am I chasing but Jesus? And for those who feel He is so far out at the finish line, I pray you can see His love could not bare to wait, for He already met you in your worst place. He went to the grave for you and is calling you to live in the victory He claimed over it by His resurrection.

There is an endless list of disciplines and to-do’s that one can pursue in hopes to draw closer to God. They in themselves are not bad, in fact, every Christ follower ought to be holding themselves accountable to some capacity of spiritual discipline. But that is not all there is. The beauty of the end is not when we check off the last chapters of our “reading the Bible in a year” plan or when we complete our 90 day devotional. Nor is it when we have marked every notebook known to man with our prayers.

My dear friend, the beauty of it all is the heart connection we grow with God over the entirety of our lives. So as you continue your journey of letting the Spirit transform you and renew your thoughts and desires, do not forget to discipline and prepare your heart in the waiting as well.

For one can work out their body all they want, but without proper nourishment on the inside, their growth will be stunted and their body will be just a shell of surface level strength. In that same way, as disciplined as you hold yourself to be, without giving attention to inward health and growth, your intimacy with God will be as shallow as a worker who simply does their job and goes home without building any relational depth with the one they work for. How can you properly do the Lord’s work without knowing His heart and hearing what He desires for you?

Thoughts to consider:

Do you often move on with your spiritual disciplines for the sake of consistency, even if it means giving up moments of quiet and stillness for God to speak?

How do you mentally refocus your attention on the main purpose of your journey towards Jesus when you begin feeling desensitized to the disciplines?

What can you implement into your routine to prioritize waiting and growth beyond the physical sense?

Consider how seeing the Word of God as active and illuminating every single day as He gives us new mercies and revelations could impact your journey with Jesus.

“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.” – Psalm 139:23-24

What He’s Done – Reflections on Daniel 3

Christian lifestyle, encouragement, spiritual formation

“But if not, He is still good.” – commonly associated with the passage of Daniel 3.

Last week, I found a picture on Pinterest with the quote above. I am going to be honest, I could not recall what it was referencing, but I had gone through Daniel before and I thought it was a uniquely short, but intriguing phrase. So without much thought, I made it my phone’s lock screen.

Little did I know, it played a large role in my perspective this past week. I am unsure as to why, but the last 6 days or so have been the kind where you reconsider everything you’re doing in life and contemplate if everything needs to change or if you’re just overthinking. Day after day, I not only was caught up in all my thoughts, but I happen to endure the most annoying and frustrating little experiences that seemed to pop up every few hours. To name a few; I slammed my finger in a door, I spilled coffee all over the inside my work bag, I hit a massive pothole, I wasted money on an insulated travel mug that doesn’t even hold heat beyond an hour, and for the cherry on top, I have been judged by all my students for the last 3 days because my eye has been insanely swollen.

Alone, these inconveniences don’t seem too bad. But as they happened so consistently, I am not going to lie, I was tempted to question why in the world God thought it was so funny to let them keep happening. But what is weird, is that I didn’t truly get mad. I am not known to be the most positive person anymore in life, and especially not when I face inconveniences. But any time I tried to cultivate some bitterness, it was uprooted and replaced with hope that good could still come out of the day. Part of me feels that may have been a result of the conviction I felt every time I looked at my new lock screen. Though that was not the only word God pressed on my heart this week.

A long time ago, I heard a song that said, “Who am I to deny what the Lord has done?” Now, I have listened to that song a million or so times since I first heard it, but for some reason, that line has been repeating in my head along with the flashbacks of the actual moment I heard that for the first time and broke into tears. Initially, I thought it was just going to go away without any purpose, but then it all hit me as I was standing outside my classroom with 22 kids asking how I could have forgotten the keys inside when we left for Chapel. Amidst their pleading for a tardy pass for their next class, I heard one kid look at me and say, “Ms. Dan, this is really just not your day, is it?”

Though I felt a sense of guilt for the mishap these kids had to experience because of my mindless action, I actually just busted out laughing. It was as though time froze when he said that to me and I realized what the point of the repetitive song stuck in my head was for and why I was so attracted to this random new lock screen.

When I got home that afternoon, I ran straight to my prayer notebook and re-read the last week’s-worth of entries. Just as I thought, page after page was dedicated to the complaints I had, while short sentences finished the entry in praise…

Let’s take a quick dive into Daniel 3 for a moment to give a background on the highlighted verse.

Leading up to the verse that inspired the quote at the top of this blog (v.18), Daniel was facing quite a pickle.

This king named Nebuchadnezzar (great inspiration for a baby boy name if you are looking for something Biblical haha), had a dream that made him highly concerned. He sought many wise men before he finally found Daniel to interpret it for him. Though Daniel did the job by the wisdom of God, the peace only lasted for so long after that. Nebuchadnezzar’s pride got the best of him and he decided to make this massive image of gold and command everyone to bow down and worship it whenever they sounded a signal. For many, this was no issue, but for Daniel’s companions; Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, this was not worth dishonoring God over.

When Nebuchadnezzar heard of their disobedience, he sent soldiers to take captive Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego so that he could throw them in a furnace. Now this wasn’t just a big ole bonfire they happen to gather together, this furnace was so hot that the soldiers who pushed the 3 men into it, were burned to death as they got closer.

Though just before they were lead into it, Nebuchadnezzar gave them a final chance to change their minds as he mocked their God. Rather than caving into the fear or responding with anger, they said, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and He will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if He does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.” (v. 16-18).

How inspiring is that bold mindset amidst such adversity? The more I looked into this passage, the more my thoughts began falling into place.

When I saw the lack of gratitude in my prayer notebook, I began to realize that perhaps that phrase, “but if not, He is still good.” and the song verse, “Who am I to deny what the Lord has done?” were divinely placed on my heart this specific week.

The flashbacks I kept having of the first time I heard that song was during a time where I truly felt little to no joy or hope and the thought of going to God as broken and distant as I felt, made my heart physically ache. Out of pure routine and half an ounce of wishful thinking, I went to a church service that had some special speaker for young adults. Though the message also hit my soul, what made me ball my eyes out like a baby in front of a bunch of strangers was that song verse. Why? Because for the first time in a year, I realized how persistent God was extending His love and how often I rejected it. Unlike those 3 men in Daniel 3, I saw the tough situation I was in and dismissed the capabilities of the God I serve.

Now, I have grown a lot since that time. But if I am honest, a large part of me still finds so much comfort in sorrow. Whether I have a reason to be sad or not, I feel secure in it. Though what I failed to notice for such a long time, was that me gravitating towards that feeling was simultaneously turning my eyes away from my reality – the reality that God is who He says He is and I have indeed been saved by Him.

God pulled me out of the pit I was in. Surely, I still suffer from some ways of thinking, but that does not negate all the goodness the Lord has done. How foolish is it to plead for deliverance, receive it, yet live the rest of your life trying to re-shackle the broken chains on yourself?

I am not advocating lying to yourself to “find joy”, but I am saying that if you desire freedom from a life-stripping cycle of behavior, you must, in every way possible, bring yourself to see the reality of God’s involvement in your life.

My dear friend, you must seek out what He has done. For as you do, the inconveniences and burdens of this world will grow strangely dim in comparison to the goodness of God and the depth of His love for you. It is then in those moments of frustration as our circumstances go south, that we too can end our prayers with, “but if not, You are still good. For who am I to deny what You have done?” and actually mean it from the core of our heart.

Thoughts to consider:

Do you find yourself magnifying the burdens of your day over the blessings?

How can you begin implementing the discipline of gratitude in your daily schedule?

Do you focus on living out the purpose you have to love God and others no matter what or do you idolize your comfort through trying to control all circumstances in your life?

Consider the way your heart can transform by aligning your perspective with the Lord’s and how that can influence others to do the same.

“But if not, He is still good.” – “Who am I to deny what the Lord has done?”

For God & For Them

Christian lifestyle, encouragement, spiritual formation

“Sometimes the best we can do is make the choice to act as if this life is a gift. That honors God. And if we make a practice of it, a practice of defying our anxiety and depression by getting out of bed and just giving a few moments of silent prayer of thanks for this life that maybe we still loathe – that pleases God. It gives hope to people you don’t even know. In time you’ll start to feel it, too, and if you don’t at least you did what was right.” – Alan Noble

The hard truth about seeking real healing is that sometimes, it requires breaking the bone again so that it can recover straight this time.

Last week I finished reading a book on managing your feelings. It paid respects to the reality of being a human without disregarding the responsibilities of a follower of Jesus. It was very intriguing, but if I am honest, there were parts of it that reminded me of the thoughts I used to have during times of great despair. I thought that would just reinforce the hopeful mindset I have been disciplining myself to recently, but I found it more common that my response was an aching for that old, comfortable place – a place where nothing could get worse, for I was already at the bottom of the pit.

As I was reading it, I battled with the desire to resort to my old ways whenever things went wrong; numbing, expecting disappointment, doing the bare minimum to accomplish daily tasks, and pushing away my time with God. It hadn’t hit me until many days passed when I realized others could notice a change. And as much as I wish I could say that challenged me to get out of the slump, it didn’t. It actually just made me more hopeless as I began to consider the healing that has been happening over the last couple of months was perhaps just a season of wishful thinking.

Even as I write this, every bone in my body and thought in my head has been trying to pull me back into the comfort of lying in bed and hiding from the weight of relaying God’s word to you on this blog.

Though the Holy Spirit is a sweet being…for all but One voice in me argues for resting in despair.

Recently I have been reading 1 Corinthians. Great insight can be found throughout every chapter, but one that has planted itself in my mind was the message of God’s desire for unity. You constantly see Paul express the importance of loving others, respecting others struggles with temptation, and the need for building peace among one another.

Now, I am no where near the most social person in the world, but I realize this isn’t about going out and telling every person you pass that, “JESUS LOVES YOU”. Surely that is a way to share God’s love, but let’s be real, I will never be that outgoing of an individual. Nor is that what scripture is telling us we must do. No, rather, what we see is Paul describe that every action, from our words, to our thoughts, to the way we dress and eat have the ability to glorify God and love on others. The overall message isn’t to be the loudest voice shouting “Jesus saves”, but the most disciplined and loving. And through our every action that is honorable to God, we make room for the heart of Christ to be reflected and open a door for the Holy Spirit to move in those around us.

I read a book called “On Getting Out of Bed” a while back. It is the one quoted at the top of this blog. The title may sound silly if you never endured a time of depression, but it was truly one of main sources of inspiration I found that led me to believe that the way things were, were not how they had to be.

It honestly threw me for a loop, because I started reading it expecting some great advice I could do for myself that would be inspiring enough to power me through the rest of my days, but such was not the complete case. Surely, there were great points on things pertaining ourselves, but it began with a reference from a book called “The Road”, a story of selfless love between a father and son. Through some incredible hardships, the father tells the son that the bravest thing he’s done was to get up this morning. Getting up – despite the risk of more trials, shame, fear, pain – even though he didn’t want to for himself…he did it for his son.

Using that story as a foundation for the perspective we should pursue, the book (“On Getting Out of Bed“) consistently pointed back to two main reasons we ought to not make our bed in the “comfortable” place of despair. First, was that the life we live was one God purposely created for His glory. Meaning, regardless of our feelings, for God, we have a duty of living honorably and in gratitude. And secondly, as a being that belongs to God, we have a duty of loving His creation; the people around us.

My dear friend, surely time will create a scar over our wounds and restore a connection between our broken bones. But that does not always mean it is healed in the way it should be. And when that happens, the only way to start really restoring what was broken is to dig back in the wound and clean out everything that was simply a mask for the pain. I was once told that realizing you are further back than you thought you were can be one of the most freeing things. I argued with that for a long time, but I believe now there is so much truth in that statement.

How much longer will you walk with a lame heart believing it is fine just because it’s not missing? It is surely frustrating and painful to face the reality of one’s brokenness, but it is the only place real growth can start from. You may argue that “it is okay”. You may believe your greatest place of safety is despair. But thank heavens, our life isn’t all about us. For those like myself would be stuck in a pit forever. It is not about what is comfortable, but what is right, honorable, and just. That kind of life, my friend, only can be lived when you seek the right thing, no matter the pain it may entail, because it is our duty; for honoring God and for loving them.

Thoughts to consider:

Is there any area of your life that you have allowed healing to happen through time and false remedies instead of through God?

Do you often consider the influence every one of your actions can have on those around you?

Would someone who never spoke to you directly be able to see the love of Christ through you – even during your greatest trials?

Consider the purpose God has for you in every season, and how much you could honor Him and love His people if you prioritized them over your feelings.

“Sometimes the best we can do is make the choice to act as if this life is a gift. That honors God. And if we make a practice of it, a practice of defying our anxiety and depression by getting out of bed and just giving a few moments of silent prayer of thanks for this life that maybe we still loathe – that pleases God. It gives hope to people you don’t even know. In time you’ll start to feel it, too, and if you don’t at least you did what was right.” – Alan Noble

July Musings: The Danger of Preferences with God

bible, Christian lifestyle, spiritual formation

“What if it doesn’t look like what I thought it would?
What if you come in ways I didn’t know you could?
Offend my mind. Reveal my heart.
I won’t worship preference anymore”
– Preference by Rachel Morley

Preference is such a interesting concept. Based on the things we experience and the unique way each one of our personalities were created, we build a “preference” about numerous things in our lives. We often say “I vote we do ____ , but that’s just what I prefer”. We make it seem like a preference is simply a harmless opinion, but what I have recently noticed, is that it actually has the ability to blind us.

I have lived in four different areas of my city, but have been taking the same road to go everywhere since I determined that was the most convenient main street near the house I lived in at 16. Nowadays, a lot more roads have been built and I live 20 minutes south of that house. Nonetheless, it wasn’t until a couple months ago that I used a road that has been here longer than the one I normally took, and from this side of town, is way more efficient. It has more turns and more side streets than the other, but it is undoubtedly the faster option to get to work, church, the mall, and truly…anywhere besides my old house haha. But until roughly 3 months ago, I never considered taking that route. I would actually re-route my GPS to take the common road I knew even if it meant a longer drive. It was…just what I preferred.

For years, I have been taking a longer path that was literally out of my way, just because it was what I knew. It was comfortable. And no matter where I was on that road, I still had control of where I would end up because there was no chance of me feeling lost. It was what I had control of. And I liked the feeling of that.

Because of my personal preference, I was blinded to the other, more efficient road. And it was not like I was unaware of its existence, because my GPS offered guidance down it time and time again. But I refused. I, like the pharisees who had a preference of what their Messiah would look like, missed out on a blessing for years because I chose to limit my perspective.

Now in the grand scheme of things, this road situation may seem like a silly example, but I did in fact waste time, money (considering the extra gas…especially in this economy), and the opportunity to see the other side of this town I have lived in nearly all my life. Slowly, but surely, what was once a good thing, became a burden because I refused to let my GPS show me a new way of doing things.

I think preferences effect more than what we choose to eat, where we drive, or how we dress. Honestly, I think they can play a large role in our relationship with God. I blogged about the blessing of a limited perspective a few weeks ago, but I feel there is a difference between a circumstance we close our mind in versus one we truly cannot change. It’s our preferences that can keep us on the fence in life because we want it our way and refuse to move until we see a path we like. But how many blessings must one miss and how much time, joy, and freedom does it have to cost them to consider they are not the Sovereign One?

I have heard people talk about the various ways God moves. I have heard about miracle stories, visions, and wisdom provided from God. But what I see is a repetition of people saying “to hear, see, or know about God, just do ____”. That blank typically ranges from reading scripture, seeking counsel, or praying more. Now don’t get me wrong, I fully believe all of those are crucial to the ones who follow Christ. But I have noticed we serve a powerful God who, often times, reaches out to us in unexpected ways while calling us down unexpected paths.

For one to confine God’s ability to communicate to us or move in our lives to a simple list of 5 or so sources, is a foolish thing to do. Though I am guilty of this.

I find it common that the way I “wait” on God after I seek Him out in prayer consists of a list of preferred interactions. And embarrassingly, they are lists of very specific ways of communicating. For example, a lot of the time I find myself praying, “God, I know a lot of faithful and respectable people around me say I should do ____, but can you make it more clear?”. Now I am not saying peace is a terrible thing to seek from God, but sometimes, as much distrust as my heart generally has towards people, God speaks through them and part of acting in faith is recognizing that I have to surrender my desire for a physical sign that tells me exactly what to do, and trust that God is capable of guiding me through His followers, though they too are broken as myself. And through an act of faith like that, it makes it more clear to see the problem is not a lack of clarity from God, but a controlling issue in my own heart – a hidden preference of mine to take God’s role in my life.

My dear friend, a preference in itself is not a sin. But just as pride can turn any good desire into a self-centered one, we must be careful about the way our preferences can mold our minds to only accept guidance we consider good enough. My GPS knew when I moved to my new house, that the better path to follow was one I did not know but would ultimately be a blessing in many ways. Though, I chose to shut it out. And unfortunately, I can’t say I have not done that same thing with God.

New paths are not always desirable at first. No one likes to feel insecure and out of control. But the beautiful thing about being in a relationship with God, is that He never leaves our side. Much like that GPS kept insisting it could walk me through that new road and still end up in a good destination. How long will you reject God’s extended love and guidance because you do not prefer the way He chose to go about it?

Thoughts to consider:

What are the most common places you look for God’s involvement in your life?

Do you spend time considering the other ways or places He may speak to or lead you by?

Are there any preferences you think may be confining God’s power to a box in your life?

Consider the awe you could grow for God by spending time in true silence during prayer, so that He has room to press anything He wants to on your heart.

“What if it doesn’t look like what I thought it would?
What if you come in ways I didn’t know you could?
Offend my mind. Reveal my heart.
I won’t worship preference anymore”
– Preference by Rachel Morley